Cellular Masturbation

A person who plays on their cellphone while on the toilet

I think there is cellular masturbation going on in the stall over because he is laughing for no reason whatsoever.

by jondich February 1, 2021

Masturbation

The only thing that makes me feel alive.

Masturbation time!

by Hitmantheman February 1, 2024

Masturbation

That thing whats girls will never tell you they do it everyday too like you. Do not lie. Everyone knows you doing right now too. Just stop it for a min.

"I never masturbate cause it's deleting memory. I read it like a half year ago... or 3 months? I can't remember.... masturbation (I have to write it to submit this help😁)

by NeverMasturbates April 4, 2019

Masturbation

What 100% of men do and can’t go more than two days without doing it.
What 50% of women do while the other 50 never even has the desire to do...

Masturbation is the polite way of saying that you fucked yourself.

by Biden is a dick April 21, 2021

masturbate

Lana was feeling lonely, so she opened "The hub" then she got wet, she started rubbing and a puddle of cum is now in her bed

I just masturbated

by poopystinkyanas May 20, 2022

Intellectual Masturbation

The act of thinking, discussing, and/or philosophizing to no one’s spiritual, mental, or physical benefit, but purely for the sake of one’s own pleasure, intellectual self-satisfaction, and/or pride.

Note: Not all intellectual and philosophical discussion is intellectual masturbation, it only falls under the definition when it doesn’t benefit those in engaged in it, only harms due to wasted time and an artificial satisfaction in one’s self.

I remember when all I would do was engage in intellectual masturbation on Discord. I would use fancy words and blabber all day about philosophy, without actually applying it in any way whatsoever. I just derived pleasure from hearing myself speak about such abstract and complex subjects. What a fool I was.

by Tea76Crumpets796 October 1, 2022

Masturbate

What the fuck is wrong with you jackoffs get a girlfriend already

I masturbate because im lonely

by 5Skin not 4Skin January 9, 2020