Covid-🦃

When desperately needed foreign workers trained to slaughter and process turkeys reared for Christmas are not allowed in the country unless they serve their 14-day quarantine on arrival, whose absence would affect producers with low supply and consumers with high price.

Thanks to Covid-🦃, a lucky percentage of the nine million turkeys in the UK would have their lives spared during this 2020 Christmas period.

by MathPlus October 22, 2020

Covid time

The weird manipulation of the perception of time during the covid-19 lockdown

"You remember when school started? Was it last week? Week before that? Earlier this week? Eh, covid time, you know how it is"
"Yep, covid time"

by somebrookdlyn October 24, 2020

Covid-D

When banner keeps saying he has had Covid and hasn’t

I’ve had Covid between March and may, the twat. Claims to have Covid-d

by DUBYAC October 27, 2020

COVID LINE

“Covid Line”

I met my boyfriend on the Covid Line”

It’s pouring rain, I’m starving and I have two more hours on the Covid Line”

What are my choices? Better get on the Covid Line!

by Krazymama October 29, 2020

covid popper

When you have cabin fever to the point were all you want is a quick switch from vaginal to anal intercourse in 30 seconds repeating the process until the fever has lifted.

Dude I haven't been out in forever, I did a good old Covid Popper on her now she dont walk right.

by El Capt obvi October 29, 2020

covid connection

When you have a romantic “thing” with someone that isn’t defined because the awkward, lonely, I’m-working-on-myself-right-now, although needy common pandemic dating mindset.

“Are they together?” - “No, I think they just have a covid connection.”

“He waits for me in front of my building every day and holds the door. It’s great.” - “Are you guys ever going to talk?” - “Probably not.”

by Izzy.Bella October 30, 2020

Covid-👻

When diehard party-goers who superstitiously believe that the coronavirus is scared of ghosts are required by the authorities to wear a “frightening” mask to remind onlookers that the virus won’t take a break just because it is Halloween.

Unlike Muslim-majority countries that ban Halloween because it is against Islamic teachings, a number of Western nations are allowing the “infidel“ festival to proceed provided the organizers strictly enforce Covid-👻 rules.

by MathPlus October 30, 2020