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Coffee 22

When you're tired and you desperately need coffee, but since you haven't yet had coffee, you're failing at acquiring coffee. (A play on the phrase "catch 22.")
I apparently needed coffee too badly this morning. I made a to-go cup, but left it on the kitchen counter at home! Coffee 22.
by ImpunityJainne February 13, 2018
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Coffee

GIVE ME THE DAMN COFFEE OR SO HELP ME GOD I WILL DESTROY YOU AND EVERYONE YOU LOVE
by YourMotherIsDeadInside June 10, 2018
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Coffee Carbonation

The act of a nice lovely lady using her back side to carbonate my fresh cup of java.
Tonya did us all a favor, not only by eating lots of cabbage, but saving that sweet nectar to carbonate my coffee. She’s mastered coffee carbonation.
by Ghoul July 26, 2018
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Caffetamine

Let's get this party started! Time to mix up a batch of caffetamine.
by Fluffiestdrop45 January 24, 2019
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Coffee

A black liquid that gives me energy and a will to live.
I was wondering why I was feeling so crappy, and then I realized I hadn't had any coffee this morning.
by The Napping Queen February 9, 2019
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Coffee Paradox

When you haven't had any coffee so you don't have the cognitive ability to make coffee.
Person 1, "Dude why is Person 2 standing there drooling in front of the coffee machine?"

Person 3, "They're suffering from the coffee paradox."
Person 2, *drools*
by YouLikeTheWayIPostitRex March 6, 2019
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coffee bum

A coffee bum is someone who mooches coffee from a co-worker or the office coffee fund but never gives any money to the fund or re-pays the person with the coffee. They are even known to leave a cup of coffee in the coffee pot , without making a new pot of coffee. Their best move is making change with the coffee fund money, then leaving the less than pot of coffee on the burner, until it turns to Carbon-12 on burndown mode and the fire alarm goes off.
Dick :

Hey Harry do you have any coffee ?

Harry:

Yeah man

Tom:

That f** ing dick never brings any coffee.

He is a f#$#ing coffee bum

Sally:

WTF is that smell!?!? ?

Harry:

It’s the coffee pot again! Some coffee bum didn't finish the pot.

Once again the Dick walks away. But he did make change.
by The Dude of the Stupid April 9, 2019
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