Pot noodle and a wank

Refering to a lousy evening spent home alone with bad food, TV-repeats and probably masturbation.

I was out last night and today he tells me:"you look knackered mate". And im thinking yeah, you look like you`ve had a pot noodle and a wank, mate.

by AluXeZ January 10, 2010

abuse your noodle

masterbate.

man1:while your girlfriend is gone are you gonna abuse your noodle?
man2:YES!

by tomcon5 February 25, 2009

Noodle My Poodle

When you are doing unholy acts . When you use a doggy prostitution. They wrap there man part in noodles and go up the poo hole

Jenny brought back Chinese last night and I though I should Noodle My Poodle. She loved it

by ISureLoveNoodles June 19, 2018

pot noodle

wow i want a wank but i didnt this afternoon cos i was being a SCALLY

i always wanted to type that word have never done i tb4

by super noodle roolz August 16, 2003

poo noodles

deficating in someones pillow. the owner of the pillow unkowingly rests their head against the pillow thereby recieveing a facefull of poo noodles

Keith layed down for the night not knowing that greg had been their earlier, POO NOODLES

by noodles of fun January 4, 2009

Noodle in the poodle house

The meaning is still unknown.

My mother user's it when talking to either dogs or cats. Howevermy dogs go crazy when mother sings it to them.

Im too afraid to ask the meaning as she may not love me anymore and i am an only child.

I once thought "maybe my mothers crazy/dementia" but who knows.

To this day it is still a mystery.

"looks theirs a noodle in the poodle house

Mother singing "a noodle and a poodle in the stinky house, the noodle and a poodle and a stinky mouse"

by Jimmybuttons-760 May 20, 2017

calm your noodles

basically calm the f*** down, chill out, take a breather.
It can also mean calm that noodle, noodle as in your penis.

Paris- OMG guys I have to do so much shit tonight, I'm going to be in over my head.
Sam- WOW why dont you CALM YOUR NOODLES...physco

by anonymousyahooligan112 May 27, 2009