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Tortoiseitis

Slower than fuck. A very slow person.
It takes that bitch forever to put her makeup on she has tortoiseitis.
by Mike Hawksbigger January 31, 2023
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Tortoise

THE MOST BADASS ANIMAL ON THE PLANET. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS A LIVING TANK.
"Damn do you see that guy over there who owns a tortoise?"
"Fucking badass"
by LiverGiver February 11, 2021
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Clapped tortoise

When someone is so clapped that they look worse than a tortoise
by Sandleradam20 June 15, 2021
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Full tortoise

Taking all the pain and punishment and enjoying it all
Mate she is harsh, he must be going full tortoise
by Vlad bad March 14, 2023
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Tortoising

When you have to poop really bad and can't hold it,that is when you tortoise. You let the poo come out of your anus just a little bit so i looks like a tortoise coming out of it's Shell.
Sir can i go to the toilet? I am already tortoising.
by Tortoising October 9, 2017
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Tortoise

A name given to the species usopp
"My new pet usopp (a tortoise)"
by WildWillez December 13, 2020
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Touching The Tortoise

Touching the tortoise- masturbation

My girlfriend sent nudes, I’m going to touch my tortoise to them
by WillyMaster1001 November 4, 2023
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