Pity-Handy

A hand job given apathetically and out of pity. During the hand job things are often said such as "are you almost there?" and it's not uncommon to make a phone call, smoke a cigarette, or text a friend during the encounter.

I don't really like that guy, but I'd toss him a pity-handy if he asked.

by WetBottom November 15, 2011

pity tug

When finding your one-night stand/booty call/random hook-up has a tiny penis and out of sympathy you give him a hand job. This is often the last encounter before deleting his number from your phone.

After Frankie found her bar fuck for the night had an incredibly small penis, she gave him a pity tug and never spoke to him again.

by superduckie September 28, 2010

pity wood

When a male forces himself to obtain an erection to prove to to his partner that he is sexually attracted to her.

Last night, I really wasn't feeling it, but I got up some pity wood to make her happy anyways.

by JDuffy March 21, 2007

Pity-vite

An invitation extended only because the inviter feels sorry for the invitee.

We sent a pity-vite to the nerdy guy for the Superbowl party because nobody else would.

by DDP1963 February 06, 2009

Pity dating

When a person is rejected so they try to get pity from their crush in order for them to date them out of it

Girl: sorry i don't want to date you
Boy: please date me i'll be broken without you :'(
Girl: well ok then
The girl pitys the guy so they are now involved in pity dating due to the guy

by Robbie rotten's ghost August 23, 2018

Pity Fishing

The act of searching for pity or sympathy by making something sound far worse than it really is.

Dave: Hey dude, what's up?

Jim: I got attacked by this massive, vicious dog in the park yesterday... I thought I was going to die...

Dave: OMG! Are you OK?

later...

Dave: Did you hear about Jim? He got attacked by a massive dog!

Fred: He's just pity fishing, I was there. He was barked at by a dog.

by Mousey 66 February 11, 2012

Pity Bologna

Bologna that is given to someone as an after thought.

Brett give bologna to his friends then offered Pity Bologna to the other people at the break table.

by Max Baskin February 07, 2023