Microphone Molesting

When you're face timing someone and the microphone is being viciously blown into, rubbed on, etc.

"Stop microphone molesting, my ears hurt!"

by A Collection of Satanists October 07, 2017

The Microphone

An extreme version of The Screwdriver where your hand comes out the mouth

Man dude Patrick really did The Microphone on me I'm so sore

by Realskskdude April 29, 2019

Spanish Microphone

When you put hot sauce in your anus and have a partner out their lips up to your cheeks and then your defalcate in their mouth.

I just gave my brother a messy spanish microphone

by Blumpkinlover4 March 29, 2024

Missouri microphone

When you engage in anal sex with a lover, and go straight to oral sex with another.

Dude, I can't believe she sang into my Missouri microphone last night...

by Chilebeso September 06, 2015

teh microphone

When a person asks you for teh microphone

Joe Mama: Give me teh microphone

Joe Dada: no
Joe Mama: GIVE ME TEH MICROPHONE

by Ninja Monke March 17, 2021

Laptop Microphone

A really fucking bad microphone that sounds like a built in laptop banana.

Horrible Microphone Kid: OMG IM SO GOOD AT THIS GAME GUYS IM BETTER THAN ALL OF YOU!
Studio Microphone Guy: Shut the fuck up and stop using your Laptop Microphone

by YoMommaJokesAreOld June 10, 2015

Polish Microphone

Pilots on long flights in small aircraft would often install in a small funnel attached to a rubber hose that ran out side. If necessary they would use funnel to relieve themselves during the flight

No need to stop at the next gas station said Bill. I'll just use the Polish Microphone

by Largo 7 May 29, 2014