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grumpy lettuce

grumpy lettuce
oversized, sloppy, and disclored vagina lips in conjunction with excessive, un-tamed, and un-manicured pubic hair and any caliber of offensive smell directly related to the vagina orifice and its activities. (i.e.-pee trapped in hair, vaginosis, and or general body odor.) symptoms are usually discovered upon removal of the panties, foreplay, entry from the doggystyle position, or via your buddy that was a first-hand victim. All in all grumpy lettuce is when the vagina resembles 2 pieces of rotten lettuce that had been sitting in the fridge a little too long. It's so bad it actually makes the vagina look unhappy.
Was it not for the grumpy lettuce I would have been able to maintain an erection.
by BroccoliRob September 5, 2008
mugGet the grumpy lettucemug.

Lactation Lettuce

Lactation Lettuce was denied on Urban Dictionary, and we, lactationlettucelickinglover420, will not stand to let it be denied a second time!!!!
by Lactationlettucelovinlicker420 February 8, 2019
mugGet the Lactation Lettucemug.

lucifers' lettuce

man, i cant find my stash of lucifers' lettuce.
by j. hickey September 7, 2007
mugGet the lucifers' lettucemug.

hot lettuce

An exquisite sex act requiring a bagged salad from a local market, a woman's accessible anal cavity, and deep, meaningful desire. First, a man (any man) closes his fist around a portion of the salad. He then lovingly inserts his fist into the woman's anus for a duration of their joint consent. When the couple is sufficiently aroused, the man releases the salad before removing his hand from the woman's anus. With the salad inside, the two enjoy a standard round of anal sex. The man must ejaculate onto the salad, as a dressing. Finally, the act is completed upon receipt of the "hot lettuce" by the man's mouth, eating the sumptuous morsel from her pooping cavity.
"No thank you, waiter. My wife and I will dessert at home with a steaming bowl of hot lettuce."
by ultramundane8 June 19, 2016
mugGet the hot lettucemug.

satans lettuce

"Dont smoke Satans Lettuce"

"Dude I got so stoned on some pretty dank Satan's lettuce last night"
by A. Lmao June 18, 2014
mugGet the satans lettucemug.

lettuce snow

Let us know!
by Cobbler June 6, 2018
mugGet the lettuce snowmug.

gay lettuce

Gay lettuce is the term given to some one when they fall for a trap without knowing they are a trap
Oh Evan did you just call Baire White hot? You Gay Lettuce
by Oh My Knob Man February 8, 2018
mugGet the gay lettucemug.

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