investigaetjens

A term coined in Australia during the Morrison Federal Government years (2019-2022) by political/social commentator Ronni Salt as a cynical reference to a number of formal government investigations into topical controversies. These investigations typically concluded by either being suspended indefinitely, or with a set of dubious or undisclosed findings.
They were led by the Secretary of the Prime Minister and Cabinet Office, Philip Gaetjens.

Someone referring to a sham political investigation of any kind would say: “They're just doing an investigaetjens“.

by bzhnky May 22, 2022

investigape

When you stop to inspect a gaping asshole.

Oh look, Jill’s butthole is wide open. Let’s investigape!

by 7h3h1d July 18, 2022

Invérstigated

There has been an investigation around here.

Dowg them got invérstigated on dat one thanh

by Lndrzz May 5, 2023

investigation of character

When a greasy ass wannabe bootlicker tries so hard but fails at the academy he has no other option but doing shit security details at the mc donalds parking lot and a lame attempt at creating a FB page. He can't even control his own FB page how in the hell is he gonna stop the hamburgler?

So lard larper gets butthurt and threatens to charge people with "investigation of character" which must be some wish.com kind of law shit like his wish.com job.

You bastards just wait. I got your names and I'm gonna have you charger with uhhhh, investigation of character.

by Regarded BARB November 17, 2023

investigaiter

A detective who checks out yer protective ankle-wear for possible evidence.

I love playing "investigaiter" wif pretty girls as an excuse to handle and massage their cute tootsies --- in every case, of course, both da cute chick and I know very well dat it's merely a joking ruse for a little touchy-feely of their warm softness, just da same as if I gleefully perform a thorough examination of their NECK-gaiters ("Oh, you just wanna play wif my boobs!"), but they're still okay wif it 'cuz they know I am getting such immense pleasure out of da experience, plus they feel flattered dat I am so enamored wif their attractive body-parts.

by QuacksO December 10, 2024

Investigation

It isn't a investigation.

Hym "You wouldn't be sharing the information you gathered in an investigation with random people throughout the state or the coworkers of the person you're investigating or the internet friends of the people you're investigating. You are clearly trying to reframe a crime that is happening to me as a necessary part of law enforcement except it hasn't stopped me from committing a crime or buying a weapon or from getting within arms reach of one of the kids I'm inevitably going to stab. What this is intended to do is already happening. It is stealing my success away from me and forcing me to be a wage slave like the rest of these assholes. Provoking violence in the hopes that you assholes can use the graves of the martyrs I create as a soapbox to push the policies for which you advocate. And if this is the kind of shit you are doing you and your kids need to be more than 'threatened.' More than just threats need to happen to you. You are so far gone that ANYONE WHO HAS EVEN SEEN YOU needs to be purged from existence. It's unconstitutional. It's a violation of my rights. It's a crime."

by Hym Iam December 22, 2024

Investigating

And I'll expound upon that by saying...

Hym "It doesn't matter if you're a politician, the president, the richest man in he world... Anyone who has even HEARD of you needs to be slaughtered. Burned. Maimed. Erased. And then your memory needs to be desecrated. There is no investigating happening here."

by Hym Iam December 22, 2024