by mekeel May 16, 2007
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Ernir
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• Ernie Fletcher
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To sit face to face with a girl while inserting your thumb into her bum and giving her a classic motorboat simultaneously.
by RiderGuy1006 October 8, 2011
Get the Burt and Ernie mug.Code word for when one of your buddies is hitting on some ugly bitch. A way of breaking the ice to him without saying she's ugly.
day after: Hey man, thanks for bert and ernie'ing me last night, I didn't want to hook up with that big bitch.
by derek_nesta March 4, 2008
Get the Bert and Ernie mug.What you call a pain in the ass ex.
These exes are the kind that have the nerve to dump you, and then talk about you behind your back as if you did anything wrong to them.
They like starting drama.
They like getting their new boyfriends/girlfriends in on making sure people think badly of you.
Probably because their ego can't take the fact that you didn't kill yourself as a result of being dumped by them.
Thus they feel the need to make others, as well as themselves, believe that you're still torn up inside over your break up by vocalizing crazy and delusional ideas.
Everyone has had and will have bad experiences with Ernie the Octopus at some point in their life, because they're everywhere.
EVERYWHERE.
These exes are the kind that have the nerve to dump you, and then talk about you behind your back as if you did anything wrong to them.
They like starting drama.
They like getting their new boyfriends/girlfriends in on making sure people think badly of you.
Probably because their ego can't take the fact that you didn't kill yourself as a result of being dumped by them.
Thus they feel the need to make others, as well as themselves, believe that you're still torn up inside over your break up by vocalizing crazy and delusional ideas.
Everyone has had and will have bad experiences with Ernie the Octopus at some point in their life, because they're everywhere.
EVERYWHERE.
Friend: "So I heard that Ernie the Octopus and his girlfriend were telling people in math class that when you passed him by in the hallway he could see your eyes glistening with unshed tears over the pain of losing him and seeing him with someone else."
You: "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA WHAT THE HELL?"
You: "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA WHAT THE HELL?"
by makemeasammichernie September 19, 2010
Get the Ernie the Octopus mug.A teacher who would rather have some nice oak dowelling than a woman.
Residing in a technology department near you is Ernie. His non-sensical manner generates vast amounts of pupil-induced histerior, normally arising from the 23 hours of pure shit that comes out of his mouth every day. Ernie is well known in Waffling Circles, and has been crowned, apparently, Bullshit King of the United Kingdom.
Amongst all of stories that Ernie tells daily (he does tell most stories many times), I have yet to hear one that is at least vaguely interesting. Nestled in-between his sagas concerning the Swedish plumbing system and Russian transport normally resides the most boring subject of all- his life. Without provocation he will enter into a phase of reflection, followed by a good hour or so of him telling us how much he hates himself. He will give us a monologue of how many thousands of pounds he has lost through being a twat, how his mother threw out his dinky toys when he was fourteen, and how we should make something in Design and Technology as boring and mundane as a door or a paint pot. Oh, the excitement.
Complimenting Ernie's horific amount waffle is Ernie's horrific amount of comb-over. Being 50 something means that Ernie is going bald, and instead of admitting it like most men, Ernie has decided to attempt to cover it up with the most ridiculous hair style you could possibly see. Every time he coughs or splutters, his comb-over lifts up a little, revealing the bald scalp below. This is not helped by the faeces coloured knitted pullovers that he often wears- knitted, presumably, by himself.
Being such a waffler means that Ernie gives us little time to actually do any work. He still demands that it be completed though, and after talking for 50 minutes of a 1 hour lesson, he complains that the resulting design looks like a pile of dog mess (or his pullover for that matter). His punnishements for poor work range from cleaning the worktops to a full-blown expulsion. It has even been rumoured that one poor pupil had to trim Ernie's nasal hair, presumably after being caught impersonating the teacher by putting a paintbrush up his nose.
Residing in a technology department near you is Ernie. His non-sensical manner generates vast amounts of pupil-induced histerior, normally arising from the 23 hours of pure shit that comes out of his mouth every day. Ernie is well known in Waffling Circles, and has been crowned, apparently, Bullshit King of the United Kingdom.
Amongst all of stories that Ernie tells daily (he does tell most stories many times), I have yet to hear one that is at least vaguely interesting. Nestled in-between his sagas concerning the Swedish plumbing system and Russian transport normally resides the most boring subject of all- his life. Without provocation he will enter into a phase of reflection, followed by a good hour or so of him telling us how much he hates himself. He will give us a monologue of how many thousands of pounds he has lost through being a twat, how his mother threw out his dinky toys when he was fourteen, and how we should make something in Design and Technology as boring and mundane as a door or a paint pot. Oh, the excitement.
Complimenting Ernie's horific amount waffle is Ernie's horrific amount of comb-over. Being 50 something means that Ernie is going bald, and instead of admitting it like most men, Ernie has decided to attempt to cover it up with the most ridiculous hair style you could possibly see. Every time he coughs or splutters, his comb-over lifts up a little, revealing the bald scalp below. This is not helped by the faeces coloured knitted pullovers that he often wears- knitted, presumably, by himself.
Being such a waffler means that Ernie gives us little time to actually do any work. He still demands that it be completed though, and after talking for 50 minutes of a 1 hour lesson, he complains that the resulting design looks like a pile of dog mess (or his pullover for that matter). His punnishements for poor work range from cleaning the worktops to a full-blown expulsion. It has even been rumoured that one poor pupil had to trim Ernie's nasal hair, presumably after being caught impersonating the teacher by putting a paintbrush up his nose.
"Ahhhhhhh. What the fuck is that stuck to Ernie's pullover.... Oh, its alright its only some nasal clippings"
"Ernie's recorded waffle made it to the final of 'The Most Boring Man In Britain' competition"
"I'd rather listen to a recording of an angle grinder than listen to Ernie"
"Ernie's recorded waffle made it to the final of 'The Most Boring Man In Britain' competition"
"I'd rather listen to a recording of an angle grinder than listen to Ernie"
by Becky Barnett September 5, 2008
Get the Ernie mug.Example 1: "Man that party last night was so Bert and Ernie bro!"
Example 2: "Dude she was sooooooooo Bert and Ernie I'm gonna hit that one more time"
Example 2: "Dude she was sooooooooo Bert and Ernie I'm gonna hit that one more time"
by SandmanIsABeast July 26, 2010
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