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tom cruise

A once good actor turned completely insane. He is now engaged to actress Katie Holmes (who looks like she's twelve but is still taller than him). Tom Cruise also VERY OPENLY practices scientology. Scientologists, I'm convinced, are trying to TAKE OVER THE UNIVERSE. I mean seriously, anything started and made popular in LA has to be frigged up. They have schools, and art classes, and buildings. ITS FRIGHTENING!!! How can you have a "religion" based off of a sci-fi novel anyway???? It makes no sense.

But really, he had a list of all the single actresses in Hollywood that he could go out with. Katie Holmes was at the end of the list. A girl has to have some pride.
"Oh my God. When she saw Brad Pitt, she went all Tom Cruise and started jumping up and down on my couch. GAWD. Now we need to get new upholstery."

"Poor Batman, he has to kiss Mrs. Tom Cruise."

"YOU SHOW EM, TOM. KICK SOME ALIEN ASS! Ooh wait...nevermind you got sucked up into the ship..."
by Mrs. Hayden Christensen July 16, 2005
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Ted Cruise

A vacation you take while your constituents haven’t had power, water or heat, and are freezing to death.
by Graydayson February 18, 2021
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tom cruise

Exremely soluble professional couch-jumper and squinter. See asshole.
by hooptie-ryder July 8, 2005
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Scooter Cruiser

A non-handicapped lard ass that rides one of those scooter things around the shopping center because they are too lazy to walk.
Watch out for that lazy fat assed scooter cruiser. She's not handicapped, she's just fat. She will run you over if you are not careful
by yobkcis June 25, 2004
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Cubicle Cruiser

A male, typically a pervert, who strolls around in his suit and tie. Likely to be found cruising cubicles or any other office area. If you find one of these near you hit them with a tranquilizer dart and keep them away from all female employees.
Did you see that cubicle cruiser on the bus? He was definitely checking out that swampdonkey in the corner.
by Laphonso September 28, 2010
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tom cruise

An exceptionally shit actor (refer to his couch jumping antics on Oprah to prove that he loves Katie Holmes), and believes eating asparagus can keep influence from evil alien souls at bay (refer to scientology).
d00d wtf happened? u used to be ok, but now ur a fuggin' mess!!!
by omg!?!?!? September 4, 2005
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Tom Cruise

A really crappy actor who is trying to promote scientology *see also fraud* but doing a really bad job of it. He has also been flipping out at everyone who does not agree with him.

"And you know, you always have to look at someone who criticizes you, you have to look at them and say, okay, so? Who is that person? Why? What do they know?"
-Tom Cruise

He is obviously a hypocrite too.
guy 1 - who's that guy freaking out on the news?
guy 2 - o that's Tom Cruise. He's an insane psycho freak.
by SkaSkankDownParty July 12, 2005
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