Took away your masturbating right

Overreaction over something insignificant and mundane

Geez! It was just a watch. Stop hyperventilating. Don't act like someone "took away your masturbating right".

by It's Catwoman May 18, 2021

When I masturbate I think of you

What normal, rational girls don't want to hear.

After band class, some random kid told me "When I masturbate I think of you."

by Jinx (Name already Used) December 27, 2010

Masturbation will make you go blind

Blindness caused from masturbation as a result of ejaculating into oneselfs eyeballs.

Grandma said masturbation will make you go blind

by Yourwrongangel November 3, 2020

Obsessive-Masturbation Syndrome is Real October

When you want to nut in November so you do this.

Fuck No Nut November! Obsessive-Masturbation Syndrome is Real October it is!

by LazuliStar June 7, 2020

Every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten.

Not only does it make you go blind and grow hair on your palms, but it also kills kittens!

Jeff: What are you doing in there Steve?
Steve: Um...masturbating
Jeff: Steve NO! Every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten. Think of the kittens!

by 89diehl September 26, 2010

free range masturbation

The accomplishment that comes with masturbating in many locations and positions

My wife left for her family trip so I took up free range masturbation around the house.

by Justjamesar December 23, 2022

Intellectual Masturbation

i.e. this is when one derives sexual pleasure contemplating an object or subject, and/or overthinking something outwith their expertise resulting in grandiosity from confirmation bias

She spent her days in intellectual masturbation over the one that got away...

by BitchfinderGeneral March 5, 2024