whittling wood

Another way of saying jerking off.

All my brother does is sit around whittling wood and watching porn instead of finding a woman to do it for him.

by jimmybomm January 4, 2021

surface wood

(n)- morning wood in which the bulge is visible through the blanket.

Only happens for those who sleep on their backs or, occasionally, their sides.

"...yeah, and my grandma walked in while I had some surface wood happening. She's blind and all, but still, I was a little freaked out..."

by edward_violet December 16, 2009

wood glued

The female equivalent to a male who is "pussy whipped"

A Female who is obsessed with a male's sexual organ or the male having sex with her, she is practically "glued" to the "wood" slang for penis

This girl I am seeing is so wood glued, she waits by the phone for me to call her

by stayblk August 12, 2011

wood plank

The act of planking on your wood, or boner.

He did an amazing wood plank, almost breaking his penis in the process of the stunt.

by Kilo Tango November 9, 2019

ho wood

1. the erectile response a male experiances upon being aroused by a prostitute

2. the sign for Hollywood Video in Salem, OR, next to the red robin

1. I got a ho wood at my bachelor party

2. Dude, let's go to ho wood and rent Titanic

by carmen novenchilagasvie February 5, 2009

Miss Wood

Miss Wood looks like mrs potato head but on crack. You can see her from a mile away because she is a whale. If you see her u will probably get 10 after schools because u looked at her weird. She sits on her ass all day and spealizes in giving people kids hard times.

Quick Miss woods coming hide your bag and hit the boost on the ASAP.

by Bathurst Channel November 9, 2018

waning wood

When your pecker wood starts devolving back to it's original form

When the strip club turned the lights on, and I saw that bitches C-section scar and her cracked out meth face it gave me a waning wood :(

by SlinkyDickTheOriginalSimp July 22, 2022