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A gender-neutral term for the act of giving oral sex to a person who is defecating. Contrary to popular belief, blumpkins are not unique to blowjobs: as humanity progresses, our definitions so too must evolve to encapsulate the diversity of grotesque and beautiful sex acts of the wild modern world.
"She braced one leg on the wall, just above the roll of Charmin, and let a long brown roll slide from her backside as he twirled his tongue betwixt the salmon-pink folds of her frontside in a blumpkin that could only be described as socially progressive."

"I caressed his erect phallus and kneeled for a blumpkin, as the remains of his dinner were violently ejected into the porcelain bowl."
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At the party yesterday I heard that Shane got a blumpkin!
Blumpkin by Cracker man 999 May 17, 2021
a pet name for a very good dog
i cant wait to see my blumpkin
blumpkin by xxnationerxx May 29, 2021

Blumpkinfest 

A Blumpkin themed festival popular with Greek-Americans and their next of kin.
Alexis was excited to go to her first blumpkinfest this weekend.
Blumpkinfest by CharlieRomeo August 26, 2021

Blumpkincentive 

The act of offering a Blumpkin as an incentive for someone to exchange goods or services.
Alexis didn’t want to do dishes until she was offered a blumpkincentive to do them.
Blumpkincentive by CharlieRomeo August 26, 2021

Blumpkin Aioli 

A dressing/ condiment, usually handcrafted, from the products that result from a finished blumpkin. Popular in Greek/ American cuisine
Alexis wanted a salami sandwich with blumpkin aioli.
Blumpkin Aioli by CharlieRomeo September 3, 2021

Blumpkin Cream Pie 

Popular Greek-American sex act. If you have to ask, you probably don’t want to know.
Alexis demanded a blumpkin cream pie from her friend.
Blumpkin Cream Pie by CharlieRomeo September 3, 2021