Jesus is an Astronaut

The act of ruining a deep, intellectual conversation with a random statement.

Scott: ... And that is why life is so confusing
Dean: Jesus is an Astronaut
Scott: Wait what?

by Dbert71 December 23, 2008

Jesus Swagger

Someone who lives a life that reflects Jesus.

That guy has got Jesus Swagger!

by jarridwilson May 1, 2016

Jesus Chrysler

A substitute for when people feel like saying Jesus Christ but don't want to. So they say Jesus Chrysler instead.

"Jesus Chrysler,That guy is being a real ass"

by SolidSnake1162 May 21, 2008

jesus bolts

The "jesus bolts" are the small, high-tensile bolts that attach the rotor pitch control push rods to the swash plateon a helicopter.

If one of these bolts fails, then one of the 'copter's rotors will be decoupled from the cyclic/collective pitch control, which is generally thought of as a Bad Thing; they are so called because if you've led a good life, afther the failure Jesus is the next person you meet.

See also zero survivability incident

Pilot: "Is this thing good to go ?"
Engineer: "Yeah, we even gave you new Jesus Bolts !"
Pilot: "Gee, thanks."

by eighthofseven August 17, 2007

Jesus holiday

The practice of a worker taking two days off from work ill before miraculously returning on the third day ie on the third day he rose again

Jarod was off ill on Monday and Tuesday, returning Wednesday before needing a sick note from the doctor. Must of been a Jesus holiday

by 10cc July 1, 2016

Jesus Boner

When your mans boner is so long that it is considered holy.

Lemme see your sweet Jesus Boner

by Cuntmuffin995 September 5, 2019

Comin of Jesus

When you’re in trouble with your boss and having a coaching session with them.

Terry was always late for work so the boss gave him a Comin of Jesus meeting

by Dnurse15 July 10, 2021