Melvin

Seeing that you are late for an event and turning back to go home
hey, so did you do a Melvin? No, I climbed the fence
by The Nan July 21, 2010
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Melvin

A mouth-breathing retard
"God Cory, you're such a fuckin melvin"
by Numirthel June 18, 2017
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Melvin

A boy who's hiding behind a cloud of weed and nicotine while he makes inaudible plagiarized beats on his computer and looks up ailments he can fake for attention in his dark room. His potential could take him anywhere if he would just be honest with himself and get serious.
BF: My throat hurts.
GF: I'm sure it's just a cold.
BF: I think I have Chlamydia of the throat!
GF: Don't overreact! You're such a Melvin!
by Planetka243 February 14, 2019
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Melvin

Clown kid that doesn’t realize how stupid he is and always touches girls and makes them uncomfortable
Yo did you see Melvin over there

Yes that Retard is doing Fortnite dances and raping a five year old again
by Shehdhdbdodo February 25, 2019
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A Melvin

An underwhelming male orgasm. If ejaculate is present, it dribbles feebly and apologetically out.
Did you just jizz your pants? Yes, but it was only a Melvin.
After wank number 5 that day, he realised was no longer enjoying himself, as his overworked phallus begrudgingly performed a Melvin.
by Invasive Protusion May 13, 2016
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Melvin

To poke someone up the bum; Melvin is usually shouted by the offender when they carry out such obscenity.
"Melvin!"

Aww, come onn! Are you gay or something!?
by I P4P4MURF I October 25, 2010
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Melvin

A guy (typically in secondary school) that is such an idiot, he will read overly flattering urban dictionary definitions of his name in front of the class. Melvins are usually known for disrupting class, not wearing medical masks properly, and claiming to be everyone’s boyfriend.
Person 1: Dude you should have seen that guy at lunch who read an urban dictionary definition of his name saying that you’d promise your virginity to him. Sarah doubled over laughing.

Person 2: Yeah, he’s such a Melvin. He even forgot John’s name.
by KyloIsBest653 February 28, 2022
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