Masturbate 

What horny teenagers do when their parents aren’t home.

Great! Now that my parents have left, I can masturbate to all the hentai I want!

Masturbate by Exterminate_all_thots July 1, 2018

masturbate 

To cuff the duke!!! this is for the hardcore masturbaters. this is modern slang. It means to really rub out a good one A good place to cuff the duke is in a roomates bed while he is out pleasuring his lady friend. cuffing the duke is great when done alone or with mulitple partners. I recommend cuffing out many dukes today.

I am going to cuff the duke(masturbate hardcore), do not disturb!

masturbate by Erik S April 30, 2006

masturbate 

Scratch your itch, diddle the skittle, wanking

"Wut r ur plans for tonite rhonda?"
"No plans. Prolly gonna sit at home n' masturbate."

masturbate by GypsieGurl7892 April 30, 2014

masturbate 

to pleasure oneself; to extract semen manually

Today Johnny wanted to masturbate, but was worried that his mother would catch him and tell him that he would go blind.

masturbate by Skeet Masta May 17, 2006

Masturbate 

Put some mayonaise on the knuckle sandwich, shake hands with uncle dick

I was putting some mayonaise on my knuckle sandwich when my mom walked in

Masturbate by Humpty August 17, 2003

Masturbate 

Waxing the Turtle or shaving the carrot.

Frederick woke up with a boner so he went in the bathroom and waxed his turtle.

He really needed to blow his load so he shaved the carrot in the shower.

"It means masturbate if you haven't got that ar tard!"

Masturbate by PeckMcGee October 14, 2008

masturbate 

*some of the* slang words for masturbation: bashing the candle, Bleeding the weasel, bleedin the weed, buffing the banana, bopping the baloney, burping the worm, choking the chicken, cleaning your rifle, corking the bat, cranking the shank, cuffing the carrot, fisting your mister, flogging your dog, floggin the frog, flogging the hog, flogging the log, flute solo, jerkin'the gherkin, looping the mule, manual override, painting the pickle, pocket pinball, pocket pool, polishing the banister, polishing the rocket, pounding your flounder, pumping the python, roping the pony, spanking the monkey, teasing the weasel, tossing the turkey, walking the dog, whipping the willy, wonking your cronker, yanking the crank, and waxing your carrot.

Now... Banning fantasizing about your neighbors wife? Well what else is a man supposed to think about while he's waxing his carrotmasturbate?
-Source: George Carlin

masturbate by Aazn February 20, 2006