An aesthetic and fashion trend popularized by TikTok and Instagram in late 2023 and early 2024, taking inspiration by 1990's to 2000's corporate culture, luxury brands and being defined by items such as "Bayonetta glasses", pencil skirts, button ups, heels and female associated formalwear. The look is intended to look sleek, mysterious, sexy and nerdy. Occupations of the "office siren" include lawyer, librarian, receptionist and most popularly, a secretary.
by gilbert mudflaps June 6, 2024
Get the office sirenmug. by BDHN January 28, 2021
Get the The Office of the Epiphanymug. Is when a grown man capitulates in the face of peer pressure and confirms his status as a beta male/ soft cock.
Alan : you should apologise to that police officer to get out of that speeding fine
Troy: sorry officer!
Alan : what the fuck did you do that for you soft cock.
Troy : don’t tell anybody.
Alan : I’ve got your back.
On work site later that day. Alan : guess what this soft cock said.
Troy: sorry officer!
Alan : what the fuck did you do that for you soft cock.
Troy : don’t tell anybody.
Alan : I’ve got your back.
On work site later that day. Alan : guess what this soft cock said.
by Captain Pepe December 19, 2023
Get the Sorry officermug. Flex Officer (noun):
An elite-tier desk goblin who lives rent-free under the Captain’s desk, occasionally surfacing to breathe through their nose holes and remind everyone that “they’re special.” Born from the unholy union of nepotism and weaponized whining, the Flex Officer is the workplace equivalent of a trust fund baby who thinks mopping is a hate crime.
They don’t work at the jail — they grace it with their presence.
They don’t get mandated — they get massaged.
Their radio isn’t even connected — it’s just Bluetooth synced to Spotify where they’ve got a playlist titled “Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss.”
Key Attributes:
• Can hold their breath under a desk for 2 hours straight if Daddy Captain is rubbing their back and whispering, “You’re my little soldier.”
• Cries “unfair!” with the power of a soap opera widow anytime someone asks them to… do their actual job.
• Works half a shift, takes a full lunch, and still needs a mental health day from the trauma of watching other people do things.
Hierarchy of Enablers:
• Daddy Captain: Wears khakis so tight you can hear his thighs beg for help. Bends rules like he bends over to scratch the Flex Officer’s belly.
• Mommie Lieutenant: Pretends to discipline but calls them “my baby” when no one’s looking.
• Uncle Lou: Definitely has something sketchy going on!
Fun Fact:
The Flex Officer once got an award for “Most Improved” after showing up to roll call on time… once… in 2019.
An elite-tier desk goblin who lives rent-free under the Captain’s desk, occasionally surfacing to breathe through their nose holes and remind everyone that “they’re special.” Born from the unholy union of nepotism and weaponized whining, the Flex Officer is the workplace equivalent of a trust fund baby who thinks mopping is a hate crime.
They don’t work at the jail — they grace it with their presence.
They don’t get mandated — they get massaged.
Their radio isn’t even connected — it’s just Bluetooth synced to Spotify where they’ve got a playlist titled “Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss.”
Key Attributes:
• Can hold their breath under a desk for 2 hours straight if Daddy Captain is rubbing their back and whispering, “You’re my little soldier.”
• Cries “unfair!” with the power of a soap opera widow anytime someone asks them to… do their actual job.
• Works half a shift, takes a full lunch, and still needs a mental health day from the trauma of watching other people do things.
Hierarchy of Enablers:
• Daddy Captain: Wears khakis so tight you can hear his thighs beg for help. Bends rules like he bends over to scratch the Flex Officer’s belly.
• Mommie Lieutenant: Pretends to discipline but calls them “my baby” when no one’s looking.
• Uncle Lou: Definitely has something sketchy going on!
Fun Fact:
The Flex Officer once got an award for “Most Improved” after showing up to roll call on time… once… in 2019.
You: “Why the hell am I getting mandated again?”
• Sergeant: “Flex Officer said he has emotional allergies to night shift, so Daddy wrote him a note and gave him a juice box.”
• You: aggressively Googling ‘how to fake your own death with minimal paperwork’
• Sergeant: “Flex Officer said he has emotional allergies to night shift, so Daddy wrote him a note and gave him a juice box.”
• You: aggressively Googling ‘how to fake your own death with minimal paperwork’
by BigDaddyBear53 July 4, 2025
Get the Flex Officermug. When you work for a company that feels you couldn't do any better and should be privileged to work there. Boss makes you feel incompetent at every turn and has his favorites.
Oh great... here comes Brian to perform more Office Abuse on all of us. Cant wait to find another job.
by Jackpot!cs February 4, 2021
Get the Office Abusemug. The sole person left working alone at the office building, often by choice, who runs around trying to keep on top of all tasks.
by MegaHuge June 25, 2021
Get the Office roombamug. When you are too lazy to get out of bed but somehow manage to be productive. All it takes is your laptop and a serious attempt at not getting distracted by too much porn
Hey darling, good morning! did you enjoy last night? Don't mind me, I am just going to do some work, you just relax -you dont need to get out of bed, this is my bed office, I work from here
by JoshyPoodles September 15, 2016
Get the bed officemug.