Condom-plated

When someone means to say contemplated but has a dick in their mouth.

He condom-plated going to the store....*suck* *suck*

by S. Shizzle September 2, 2013

how much cum can a condom hold

a condom can hold maximum one litre of cum.

i cummed 100ml into a condom yesterday!
jessica asked me how much my condom could hold.
how much cum can a condom hold

by yessysir March 21, 2024

Condom Shame

When a person feels embarassment when buying condoms. This was very common in most of us the first several times we ever bought condoms. we would hesitate forever before picking up the box or pack and going over to pay for them. Or worse, some stores had them behind the counter, so we had to ask. WE would hesitate, stammer, stutter before working up the courage. Eventually most people do get over Condom Shame. Condom Shame is perfectly natural, due to our conditioning when growing up that sex is 'naughty' or 'dirty'.

Even being over Condom Shame, you can still possibly experience Condom Shame once in awhile. I, Ted Rimmel Jr once suffered condom shame years after being over Condom Shame. I go into the pharmacy to buy condoms. I have 2 boxes each of ultra thin and of ribbed for her pleasure. A girl who knows me somewhat is the cashier. There is a line behind me as I go to checkout. The conversation went "Hi Ted" "Hi." "You planning a big special weekend are ya?" "No". Girl says as she taps on condom boxes "Come on, I can see." I said "Well yes, it is a very big weekend." The girl picks up the condoms, rings them up. As she rings them up she proceeds to tell me (somewhat loudly)"Aww Ted I KNOW your mother is absolutely going to love you using these with her. Truly." There I was suffering an episode of Condom Shame.

"What took you so long in the pharmacy? You were just going to pick up a couple things."
"Well I had to buy condoms, and it took me awhile to work up the courage. I guess I was suffering from a bad case of Condom Shame."

by Ted Rimmel Jr December 4, 2024

Asian condom

What the spice/flavouring packets for instant ramen/noodles are called since they look similar to condom packets

"Yo, Yam can you hand over the asian condom? These noodles lack flavour"

by TheGuyNextPlanet March 17, 2024

Card Condom

A "Card Condom" is a slang term for the soft plastic sleeve that sports card collectors use to protect their cards from damage. They are also used by many people who are down with trading card games due to the high value and rarity of some cards in play.

You just payed $600 for that Black Lotus card you bought online and you still insist on playing with it without using a card condom to protect it from all of the scratches caused by our wooden table?! Are you crazy?

sleeve cover protect plastic card condom scratch damage glove

by Ivanchuk "Gore Buff" June 24, 2014

Squishy Condom

A true pimp, someone who gets laid when he wants it and has multiple ladies on his dick.

by Anonymous October 19, 2003

non disclosure agreement condoms

Don't kiss and tell. period!!!!!.

Don't typically have sex. But when I do, i use non disclosure agreement condoms.

by Icomeoffassadickbutimnotsortof February 27, 2023