Matterbation

an individual that jerks off in the washroom at work

Matt disappears daily for a good vigorous session of Matterbation

by dumbass1 June 1, 2015

mattress music

Mattress Music is Sex/Sexy Music.. Sexy Music you listen/dance too.

Mattress music is Jeremih: Birthday Sex

by _Tookié_ May 5, 2016

mattress music

Mattress Music is music you have sex or dance to.

Mattress Music is Jeremih birthday sex or Bedrock.

by _Tookié_ May 5, 2016

mattress lap

An bountifully haired pubic region, usually on a female, with the appearance of a part stuffed mattress.

Uncommon due to the exponential growth of styled pubic depilation amongst the teen and twenty something demographic.

Wow look at that!!

Ya think it's a merkin?

Mebbe, but it is a she is a true Mattress Lap

by Townsman July 28, 2016

mattress folder

When they fuck you so good you grab onto the mattress and bend it...in a sense folding it

Bro my girl is so good in bed. Really mattress folder good?? Hell Ya she is a mattress folder.

by shyvanismommy July 3, 2016

Mattress Monster

A Mattress Monster is a fat and or butt ugly broad who likes rough and dirty sex and is likely to be infected with multiple varieties of crotch rot.

Dude 1: "Hey man, that broad's hot. I'd do her so hard her grandmother would cum!"
Dude 2: "Oh man! That's sick, you couldn't pay me to stick my dick in that fucking mattress monster. She looks like the love child of Roseanne Barr and Caitlyn Jenner!

by Nubian_Mattress_Monster July 15, 2016

mattress sniffer

A mattress sniffer, someone who hides under a bed in the hope of sniffing their ladies period leaks

Man I'm such a mattress sniffer, last night I hid under the bed with my wife's tampons so she had no choice but to leak her red gushing goodness everywhere

by StretchyRaff November 29, 2016