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jesus wafer

The thin, brittle slice of "bread" that passes for the body of Christ during communion. It is, of course, washed down with a swig of Jesus juice.
Gregg: Why are you awake now? You were hammered last night.
Doug: Dude, I'm getting dragged to church.
Gregg: Oh, lame.
Doug: It's cool. I can space out until they serve the jesus wafers. They always help my hangover.
by Doug E Fresh Barcelona November 22, 2009
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Pure Jesus

When something is extremly awesome.(Picture it as a can of some liquid.)
Tom: How was that concert last night? Did it rock?
Nick: Man, It was Pure Jesus!!
by Jack Of Hearts!! April 1, 2009
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Jesus Couple

When a couple is so perfect together , They're named a 'Jesus Couple'. Only rare special , good looking couples are allowed to be named a Jesus Couple. Those who are a Jesus Couple are to be respected since they're too perfect.
Lauren : Omfg , Angelina & Brad are a total Jesus Couple !
Zaida : Totally ! They're perfect together !
Lauren : I wish I was in a Jesus Couple !
by Victoria Vasquez January 16, 2013
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jesus pod

Apple's 16Gig iPod Touch, one of the most hyped and sought after iPods to date. It is often mistaken for the Jesus Phone.
"Is that the Jesus Phone? No it's the Jesus Pod."
by Kiyotaka October 10, 2007
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the bearded jesus

When your trabagging your girl and accidentally shart
I was tea bagging my girl the other night and accidentally sharted on her face. She look like the bearded jesus
by Tweeter23 October 5, 2018
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jesus tanning

Turning one's forearms over during tanning or extended time in the sunlight, in order to better tan the pale backs of one's forearms. This technique was created to also help prevent sunburn on one's forearms. The performer takes on a pose similar to that of Jesus on the cross.
Observer: "Why are you holding your arms like that?"

Performer: "I'm Jesus tanning! Burnt forearms are the devil's work!"
by Robert Chives July 28, 2014
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Jesus Nuggets

Delectable bites of chicken which can be purchased nationwide at any Chic Fil A location.
Shit! I want Jesus Nuggets but, it's Sunday!
by Isaac123garris May 14, 2016
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