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soccer mom

an out of touch woman who drives her kids to soccer games and plays and usually bitches about everything under the sun. she can be seen bitching at managements of compenies and usually "thinks" a kid is better than everyone and anything else including a dog

she also has this "idea" that she is still in her teens/early 20s when in reality she is far from that and tries to be "cool" by subscripting to magazines meant for teens which makes her pathetic
"oh man that's one pathetic soccer mom she should stop bitching and get a life"
by thedude July 11, 2004
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soccer mom

An arrogant rude peice of shit. She drives around a gargantuan, gas guzzling, jap crap suv. She has no life, and gets angry because hubby is at work all day. Speaking of hubby, he's probably masturbating at Hooters while his stupid bimbo wife maxes out the credit card. It's a miracle anyone would even want to fuck a soccer mom, because they are fat and ugly.
My mom is not a soccer mom. She let's me play GTA: Vice City Stories on my psp while she drives a pickup truck at the speed limit. Then I take a break from my game to flip off the soccer mom passing us at 70 mph. She gets in an accident trying to cover her kids eyes.
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Soccer moms

The stupid ass moms in america who preach about global warming because of huge vehicles being driven then they leave in their H2 Hummer to go get their spoiled bratty ass 'angels' from school to bring them to their after school shit and get groceries then go to their PTA meetings to chat about how they can 'make the world safer' for their overprotected children. They are obsessed with safety, censorship, and their children will never be able to survive in the real world alone because they won't know what to expect in life. These moms love to make other people miserable by telling them what to do when children are present and they act like children will forever be children and never become adults. They parent so that their kids will grow up to be christian 40 year old virgins listening to Bach and Kidz Bop and watching Barney and Telletubbies. They are the reason everything has censorship, saftey things that can't be turned off because a child MIGHT JUST MIGHT sit in the back of my screaming metal deathtrap.
Everything rated pg-13 and over, cars with t-tops, convertibles, loud engines, go fast are sinful. Music not sung by children or is not about fairy tales is the Devil. They made the government change the law so that kids have to sit in a car seat strapped down like they are in a roller coaster until they are so tall when when i was little, we could stand up in the front seat. Fucking Soccer moms took the fun, risks, and thrills out of childhood and they made our children into pussy wimps.
I drive a red rice-burning t-top firebird, listen to heavy metal, am learning German, drive fast and good, hate fast food, watch porn and violent movies, do not shelter children, and i am street smart: I am the definition of a soccer moms nightmarish encounter.
by Deutsch Thespian January 17, 2008
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soccer mom

A white woman in her 30s or 40s. She drives a a. S.U.V. b. Volvo or c. MiniVan. she drives at least 10 miles under the speed limit, and honks too much. she basically has no life other than monotiring every movement of her kids' lives. she has a My Child is an honor student at _________ Elementary School. she is ugly.
Look at Mary-Ellen. The way she cares for her kids. What a fuckin skank. stupid soccer mom.
by That freakin loser January 18, 2006
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soccer mom

Whiney, annoying, bitchy women who whinge about their kids playing violent games (San Andreas is a favorite), watching violent or pornographic movies, browsing the internet and talking in slang. Bitchy bitch bitchness.
A soccer mom would post a comment on a DBZ forum that reads: My three year old would watch it if I let him. I made the mistake of having the cartoon channel on around then, NOT for dragonball Z but batman beyond which follows. The Z came on and I was appalled....not just because its violent, because Batman beyond is somewhat violent...but in Z that's all there is...fighting, that's it. No real credible plot beyond that that makes any sense. In addition, it made my three year jump up and start punching after one viewing. With batman beyond, he jumps up and pretends he's flying, or talks about the plot (why was that guy put in that school prison? How can Inque turn into liquid?)
There is no discussion of plot with z, except to ask "what is going on?".

As far as what the z stands for, since kanji doesn't have a directly analagous alphabet, I imagine that was dreamed up by the english translators.
by Bumsley August 2, 2006
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Soccer Mom

a usually white, overly-rich, insecure jerk that hovers over her kids like helicopter moms. she usually forces her kids to attend some afterschool activity such as soccer (duh) or ballet. her kids are "little angels" and she loves them more than anything while in real life she probably wants to punch them in the face non stop. the soccer mom's looks usually range from -10 to 6. the are usually seen wearing some ugly exercise clothes, and driving some big-ass, ugly SUV or van when the only have one or two kids. soccer moms are the main cause of ESRB, the V-Chip, iPhones, tracking devices, drunk husbands, car accidents, traffic jams, bad parking, and asshole kids. when they come into contact with you, they will seem very nice and polite, but the seccond you turn around, they will say something bad about you and be jealous. also, most of them have southern accents and live in north carolina or any redneck state.
every time i go to school, there is a swarm of ugly Chevy suburbans, ford explorers, Cadillac escalades and any other overweight car. inside these cars are angry depressed women (Soccer Mom) abusing their kids and bitching them around
by lucasthegreat January 21, 2013
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soccer mom

A suburban mom in her 30s or 40s who drives a giant ass SUV, drives her 2 or 3 kids to soccer practice and tapes episodes of Oprah. They enjoy singing to crappy songs in the car with their kids and eat that sh!t they have at McDonalds because their too damn lazy to cook dinner.
Dude 1: Is that your mom's SUV
Dude 2: Yeah!
Dude 1: Your mom's a soccer mom!
Dude 2: No sh!t player
by Brendj3 July 2, 2006
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