Spoons fever

Spoons fever is a severe form of depression gained specifically from working at a Wetherspoon. It can be identified by grumpiness, easilily irritable mood, dead look in someone’s eyes and just a general loss of the will to live.

“It was really busy in the pub on Monday and I looked over at Andy who was in the middle of pouring eight pints of Tennants and three pints of Guinness for a group of guys and I could instantly tell he was getting spoons fever from the look on his face as the guys kept changing the order.”

“Don’t expect me to be in a good mood today I have spoons fever I’ve been working for seven days in a row and still have three more until I am off, I need a holiday!”

by SassySpooner January 8, 2019

Spoons Dad

Wetherspoons waiter who shares wisdom, humour and concerns. Looks out for you whilst you get drunk on a budget.

"Good effort, remember to keep hydrated"

"Mate, check Clifford out, he's being a proper Spoons Dad".

by MurrMiteFish9 June 28, 2022

Spoonoil

An oiler that is the boat alch spac god(needs a nerf ngl) while also streaming his insane gameplay on his twitch at twitch.tv/spoonoil

OMG, spoonoil is here!

by (gold)Blob August 30, 2022

Cool-spoons

An accessory for your cool beans. “Cool-spoons” can be used to describe anything cool.

“Bro I just got a new dog!”

“Woah cool-spoons, dude!”

by P.e.s.0 September 7, 2020

Bleached the spoons

To make a remark on social media that opens you up to ridicule and hilarity.

I bleached the spoons when I said One Direction were musicians.

I bleached the spoons when I didn't know who Shakespeare was.

by Zixer May 5, 2014

spoons in the barnyard

term of exasperation

"Spoons in the barnyard, I got a 20 on my computer quiz!"

by Lindsay Hamel June 10, 2008

Spoons after lunch

It means that it's too late to change something that you did.

Guy1: "I wish I finished school with better marks."
Guy2: "Well, spoons after lunch now."

by 50Euros March 30, 2015