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white people time delusion

Also known as WPTD, when a white person consistently attempts to be on time, but always ends up running 15-45 minutes late, thereby actually running on black people time.
Tracy told me she'll be here in an hour and a half, but ended up calling me two hours later to tell me she was almost here, she definitely has white people time delusion. Many CEO's, performers and millionaires run on this time. Also known as Rock Star Time.
by pokie nose December 20, 2010
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White People Time Delusion

The White People Time Delusion is a common condition among white people. Some will say that they will start running on Black People Time, but this is not correct.

Usually under this affliction, white people will arrive at WHATEVER THE FUCK time they want, even if the time they are to arrive on is very important. For example, a graduation, funeral, party, their own fucking funeral, you name it.

Also, white people will commonly be angry at YOU for being mad at them for arriving at whatever fucking time they please.

To note: No. They are never just "five minutes away." That is part of the delusion.
"It's 3:30... Mom just got here. She has to have the White People Time Delusion. She was supposed to be here at noon."

...

"Yesterday."
by Stan S. February 2, 2023
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christmas car sales delusion

buy someone a CAR for christmas?? HUH?? -did someone tell these dealers i'm shitting golden eggs?? -GOLLY GOSH DARN!! (respect for christians!!) -what kind of world are we living in??

-even if i were a 'high roller', the person would have had to have been a basic slave to me, to rate that.........(this includes SEX!!)
most of the car dealers have the christmas car sales delusion!
by michael foolsley December 15, 2010
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Delusions of Contour

When a woman believes the more amount of makeup she wears, the more attractive she appears to be.

This is never the case as it only highlights their crippling insecurities and nonexistent self-esteem.

Like all mental illnesses, women who suffer from delusions of contour need professional help.
Darius: Yo did you see Emily at the party last night?!
Jude: ya but she was looking beat ngl
Darius: that birthday makeup she had on was outlandish!
Jude: kinda feel bad, she got some serious delusions of contour. Homegirl was out here lookin like Pennywise from Wish!!
by bredsheeran81 January 2, 2024
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snapchat delusion

The delusion that comes with being on Snapchat and constantly thinking you look like your filtered version of yourself
Girl: Posts clearly filtered picture
Guy: Hey we know that really isn’t you and that you’re not really a cat
Girl: Dont be hating cause you think I’m cute
Guy: She clearly has Snapchat delusion

Girl: *snap* look at me shimmering and having day
by DD Alwhiney December 13, 2019
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Delusions of grandeur

A high sense of importance, despite the fact that all evidences points to the contaru
Aya halabi - I’m going to marry drake

Person 1 - that’s insane, you’re obsessing over a celebrity who dosent know you

Aya halabi - noo, you don’t get it I’m like the perfect girl, every rich and famous person wants me so bad!!
Person 1 - your nose covers your whole face, you have pimples dotted throughout, and you have a butt chin

Aya halabi - I’m still sexy.

Person 1 - you have delusions of grandeur!
by Realmoneygettingassnigga November 19, 2023
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Birdman Delusion

A delusion of egomania, akin to the narcissitic protagonist of the film Birdman, a failed actor who tries to bridge the gap between his hopes and his sad reality - the life he aspires to and the life he has.
"Jennifer is having a Birdman Delusion - she's writing a one woman play on middle-class singletons in NYC."
by Notorious L.O.Z. February 24, 2015
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