there's so much stress in my life, so i need to smoke

phrase beginning smokers say to their parents (and rarely, children, spouses, or siblings, and very rarely, grandchildren) when they are told it's unhealthy for them and such people tell them not to continue

Mother: "You've been smoking, haven't you? I can smell it on your clothes even when you tried to cover it up."
Daughter (angry and embarassed): "Mother! There's so much stress in my life, so I need to smoke, okay?! Daddy keeps putting on that shitty rap channel and it stresses me out, so smoking will calm it down".
Mother: "Watch your mouth there, young lady. Don't let that bother you. He's just teasing you and you know it. And, you won't smoke anymore or he'll hear about it".
Daughter: "I won't smoke at home, okay? I'll just do it outside the home, and I'll cover it up when I'm done. No one here will suspect a thing."
Mother: "You won't do it anywhere! You're done with it now!"

by Karen Stickney November 25, 2007

We need to stop treating religion as anything other than delusion, it's making everything worse

I mean, I hate to piss on your parade but snakes dont talk.

Hym "We need to stop treating religion as anything other than delusion, it's making everything worse. It makes neurotic little gnomes think they're better than everyone and it's annoying. If you want to worship your little reality monster thans fine but NO I don't believe to talked to it and NO I'm not going to do what it said. I love the pageantry of it and the extended lore is interesting but, no... We're not living our lives or structuring our country based a guy who claimed to know a magic guy. If the magic man comes back, HE can tell me what HE wants himself and YOU... Can go fuck yourself."

by Hym Iam November 22, 2023

there's no need to act the faggot

A polite way to offer some sound advice to a man acting in way not perceived to be masculine.

Bro there's no need to act the faggot. People get beaten up or worse for that.

by de-pube September 20, 2022

i need to B my L on someone's Ts

I need to Blow my Load on some Titties

an expression used in Forgetting Sarah Marshall.

Some variations:
gotta B my L on them TTs
i'm dying to B my L on someone's Ts
yo i gotta B my L on at least one T tonight.

Brian: You don't need to put your P in a V right now.

Peter Bretter: No, I need to B my L on someone's Ts.

by Peter Bretter May 2, 2010

"There's something I need to tell you" drama

Typical (usually teen) melodrama where nearly every episode includes the phrase "There's something I need to tell you". The "something" usually involves a previous lie, backstab, pregnancy, or other misdeed.

"I can't believe I just watched 7 episodes of 90210 in a row!"
"That's pretty sad... what do you think is wrong with you?"
"I don't know... I think I'm addicted to "There's something I need to tell you" dramas."

by liversounds July 14, 2014

i need to B my L on someone's T's

I Need To Blow My Load On Someone's Tits. (From the movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall)

Rory: Hows the Sex Life?
Donnie: I Need To B My L On Someone's T's.
Rory: Me Too...

by Donald Schwartz May 8, 2008

Here's what you need to know

This is one of the Legacy media's current buzz phrases circa 2022. It is usually part of the headline of a news story. It is meant to grab your attention with its imperative "YOU NEED TO KNOW". It is unclear what will happen if you don't know about the subject in question, however, the phrase compels the reader explore further.

Thinking about going outside today? Here's what you need to know.

by Dr. Zauis November 25, 2022