Fig newton

When an uncircumcised person fucks a girl in
the ass, then proceeds to take their dick out.
After doing this, they move the foreskin
foreward, and if there's poop inside, it
should resemble a fig newton.

James: yo bro I fucked this girl and when I
pulled out, there was poop in my foreskin.
John: damn bro she fig newtoned you!

by Kslatty February 7, 2023

Fig Newton

Replacement term for the F word referring to homosexuals, does not sting as much when used negatively.

"Quit being a fig newton, I'm trying to watch the stream"

by Fundabz June 7, 2013

Fig Newton

The most godly food in the universe. The greatest cookie thinger ever. It contains the jam of figs and is covered by a chewy cake bread.

Kevin, eat this fig newton because you are stupid.

by BDALE4LIFE September 26, 2005

Fig Newton

A nice way to say faggot with out disrespecting somebody.

Dude you're such a Fig Newton!

by CIZE June 7, 2013

fig newton

as defined by Stewie Griffin "It's like an orgy in my mouth"

I ate a fig newton and it was like an orgy in my mouth.

by Ryan Comedic INC October 15, 2006

Fig Newtons

The pathetic substitute for real cookies like oreos or chips ahoy. Often bought by overprotective, health-conscious mothers.

-Hey little Johnny, do you want dessert?

-Ya mom! What's there to eat?

-Fig Newtons

-Fig Newtons? Fuck you, mom.

by Barnaby J. August 8, 2008

fig newton

the most addicting cookie ever on the planet earth

I just ate a whole bag of fig newtons

by misaki December 28, 2005