Buttometer 

Intuition by some who can identify one by their derrière.

My buttometer tells me that's the perp.

Buttometer by PineappleJuice April 3, 2015

Buttometer 

A thermometer, when used rectally.

I couldn't get Junior to stop screaming long enough to get an accurate temperature with an oral thermometer, so I had to go buttometer on him. That'll learn him.

Buttometer by Findlaybob December 22, 2019

Bantometer 

Measures the level of banter or 'bants' in the room

Stephen: your momma fat
Steven: at least my momma didn't leave me
Stephen: dude that bant is off the bantometer, too far man too far

Bantometer by Mr BigG April 22, 2015

bastometer

a scale used to determine the bastardism exhibited by men.
scales include vomit inducing bastard,boring bastard, bit of a bastard, stupid bastard, bastard, complete bastard, complete and utter bastard, extreme bastard and c**t.
To be used in conjunction with the complometer

after much thought she rated him as bit of a bastard on the bastometer

bastometer by liz and claire October 1, 2007

burrometer 

A measuring device dat predicts da amount of briars and brambles dat you're likely to encounter during a trek.

Asking da local natives about da denseness and varieties of undergrowth in their area can be a good burrometer of how difficult --- and possibly painful --- your jungle-journey may be; enlisting da help of one or more of said robust indigenes to both guide you through difficult terrain and slash through the worst thickets of thorn-bushes can be of great value to your venture.

burrometer by QuacksO March 1, 2021