Skip to main content

Martin Martini

A barnacle connoisseur, a very close talker, slurps on oysters regularly at random gay bars around the US. Known as M M for short , few if not zero have tasted his martini and remembered about it the next day. Some people still kinda like him mostly because he was the sole reason Bill Cosby's barnacles were removed, this is also partly how he got his nickname (Martin Martini) Bill crosbty taught M M everything he knew, some even say M M has surpassed Bill Crosty in his drug and fuck abilities. If you so much as catch a glimpse of the actual M M in person close your eyes and mouth, bow your head and start praying... it is out of your control, if for some reason he decides to not drug and fuck you consider yourself one of the luckiest people breathing on earth right now with the odds of being struck by lightening in your lifetime is 1 in 3,000. the odds that you make it out of that fag bar undrugged and unfucked by M M are about 666 in 666,666,666 Not like you'd know if you've been drugged or fucked anyways M M does a great job at cleaning up and has had many years to profect his work.
"Hey Jim do you remember that one guy we met at the bar last night, he would talk real close and his breath smelled like your sister pussy?"
"No bill i didn't even remember waking up yesterday" *Intro scene for CSI: Miami*(case of the forgotten Martin Martini)
Martin Martini by Jim brown eye August 17, 2016
Martin Martini mug front
Get the Martin Martini mug.
See more merch

<..7.9.7.6.>Mitsurugi Martin Martines Martinez Mitsurugi<.7.9.7.6.> 

<..7.9.7.6.>Mitsurugi Martin Martines Martinez Mitsurugi<.7.9.7.6.>
<..7.9.7.6.>Mitsurugi Martin Martines Martinez Mitsurugi<.7.9.7.6.>

Bald Martin 

Bald Martin means an absolute lad a man that can do anything they are not just genius but bald one. It has been said that they are alpha male and are pro at hide and seek
Oh my look at that bald Martin he is such an alpha
Bald Martin by The truth giver December 17, 2019

bald martin 

A literal god amongst men. However, he is often pranked by his idiotic stepson - Morgz - who doesn’t realise his true power
Wow, you’re so powerful, you’ve got about 1% of bald martin’s power

Martin Freeman 

A British actor well-known for his work in The Office and his upcoming role as Bilbo in the Hobbit. He also plays John Watson in the recent BBC adaptation of Sherlock Holmes, and is made of kittens.
He goes fast.
Martin Freeman by brasshelix March 16, 2011

Bald Martin 

Bald Martin is the human personification of perfection.
'I wish I was Bald Martin'
Bald Martin by bald martin the god December 18, 2019

bald martin 

The most powerful creature on this planet. His stepson Morgz does not see his true power and will one day be overthrown by this God of a man. Bald Martin will also conquer the human race and save us all from the impending doom of Morgz Mum
You: You are such a Bald Martin, Jesus!

Jesus: Gee thanks
bald martin by BaldMartinIsMyDad November 21, 2019