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Colonial Fetish 

A specific subdivision of white fever or other racial fetishes. They don't just want ANY person of that race, even if they're objectively better looking, they only and exclusively want someone from the exact same countries that oppressed their ancestors. It's like a kind of sexual revenge. This is most common with Indian women after English D or Jewish women who crave Germans. It's a very Stamp on me Daddy kinda creepy. Verify a woman with a fetish doesn't have this. She might just be using you for your sperm and expecting you to foot the bills, unlike all the IVF costs of using a proper sperm bank, which her family would never allow to save face.
"Our third cousin Sangita got married last week."
"To who?"
"Some bland, chubby, short white guy, according to her socials."
"Ew, why?"
"Colonial fetish, she insisted he must be English according to family."
"That's gonna end badly."
"Yeah, she probably needs some therapy."
"Why did he marry her?"
"He thinks he can rescue her, from her own culture. She called our men abusive."
"That's definitely gonna end badly. Our men aren't like, terrible, she's just too picky."
"Doesn't every colonial fetish end badly?"
"True. I give it a few years."
"Same. She just wants a kid out of him but he has no idea."
"Let's stay out of it."
"Agreed."
Colonial Fetish by paint88 June 30, 2024
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Colonial Blowjob 

The act of receiving a blowjob to completion, then immediately kicking the providing person out of their own home.
Dude I got the best colonial blowjob last night... the chick's fridge was full, I'm gonna eat rich for weeks.
Colonial Blowjob by Anima_Caston August 28, 2024

Colonial Shower

A deeply humbling, character-building experience in which your hot water heater betrays you, forcing you to abandon all modern dignity and bathe using bowls, pots, or a sad plastic container—like a disgraced aristocrat in 1776.

Typically involves standing half-naked in your own bathroom, questioning your life choices while pouring lukewarm water over yourself one cup at a time and pretending this is somehow “fine.”

Bonus points if you whisper things like, “This builds resilience,” while shivering.
“My water heater died and now I’m taking colonial showers like I just got off the Mayflower.”

Colonial girl 

i.e. any Gen Z'er or Gen Y'er who espouses the now obsolete & prejudiced views of her parents, grandparents & ancestors, etc. who likely profiteered financially, socially & culturally from colonialism, yet presenting a facade of inclusivity and progressiveness through appropriation, by attending yoga lessons, drinking matcha lattes and eating avocado toast with their parents' money.
The pseudo socialites of London were in their colonial girl eras, organising summer vacations to the hoary and sinister lands of the swarthy skinned uncouth, to bring with them enlightenment...financed by their wealthy fathers...lacking only in manpower from human rights and labour legislation that no longer permitted indentured servitude...

Colonial Middle School 

A place where you can smell miami mint geek bar mixed with period blood at all times! and maybe learn sometimes but thats rare for this school. its filled with a bunch of lafayette hill preppy lululemon wearing girls, conshy and plymouth ppl who try to be ghetto, whites who say the n-word, weed smokers, and drug doers. unless you wanna go to a school where their is 5 fights in one day, do NOT recommend.
person 1: where do you go to school
cms student: fuck is u talking about bitch ima bitch slap yo ass
person 2: you must go to colonial middle school!

Colonial Middle School 

Colonial Middle School is a place that will make you want to kill yourself. You will not meet anyone nice here unless you are a 5’1 busty Latina with quadruple f cups, a white or white washed bony girl yielding Starbucks, a privileged Caucasian male with the same copy and paste ice cream scoop haircut, or a black kid who leans into the stereotypical black boy/girl stereotype for the amusement of said white males. If you don’t like any of these descriptions, I would recommend running for the hills FAR FAR away from this school. If you’re already enrolled, prepare to be outcast, a lifetime of therapy, or death. If you still decide to come for the academic aspect, you will be sorely disappointed. The teachers refuse to teach and have an outburst when the students test scores reflect this. If you happen to meet a teacher who is nice to you and CAN teach, they are most likely a pedophile. Not only this, I would not feed any of this school food to Jeffery Epstein. It is often expired, undercooked, or is simply “straight up ASS.” The bathrooms are also FILTHY. If there aren’t popular kids slurping on geek bars like their lives depend on it giving you dirty looks for simply needing to use the bathroom, there are shit, period blood, or piss on the floors and walls. In short, do not attend this school if you do not have the funds for rehab after graduation.
Colonial Middle School made me develop PTSD

Colonial-poisoned 

Colonial-poisoned: A worldview shaped by colonial ideologies like white supremacy, patriarchy, and capitalism. Often unexamined and rooted in cishet, Western norms.
1. Brad is so colonial-poisoned that he can't fathom a world where everyone is equal.