Phone Herpes 

Phone Herpes iswhen your phonejust turns off. The reason it is called phone herpes is because it spreads, once your friend's phone has it, its a matter of time before you have it.

F***ing Phone Herpes, I have to turn it on again!

Phone Herpes by useacondomwhenitcomestophonese November 13, 2009

Jamaican herpes

Burn(s) on the lip(s) caused by smoking a joint or roach too close to the end.

That doobie was burning so hot it gave me Jamaican herpes!

Jamaican herpes by RandomWords April 30, 2013

Friendzone Herpes 

When A guy/girl That will not leave you alone is causing the root of all your problems.

"He wont leave me alone! And my mother thinks were dating now. My friends are leaving me , and so did my significant other." " Sounds like you've got Friendzone Herpes."

Friendzone Herpes by CannibalismIsMySpecialty February 28, 2016

Hepatitis herpes 

When you get so many sexually transmittited diseases your genitals fall off.

Dude he went to tampa and came back with hepatitis herpes.

Hepatitis herpes by Wanknipple April 20, 2017

Don't go catchin herpes

What you tell your son or daughter before you know they are going to get a high on marijuana. Something you tell you boyfriend/girlfriend before you know they are going to smoke a blunt. Something you tell your friend before he hooks up with rando at the bar.

Hey johnny, don't go catchin herpes now.
Hey bri, be home by twelve, and don't go catchin herpes.

I know your cheating on me, but I still love you, but don't go catchin herpes.

Don't go catchin herpes by SsTtUu00 June 20, 2011

You couldn't catch herpes in a whorehouse 

A more sexually explicit version of, "You couldn't catch a cold", meaning that someone is not good at catching anything.

Wally was so non-athletic, he couldn't catch herpes in a whorehouse.

OR

Being pursued by bad guys: Can't you guys keep up? You couldn't catch herpes in a whorehouse!

You couldn't catch herpes in a whorehouse by GallopingSausage April 10, 2019

Finger Herpes 

(noun)

A brain-rotting STD, "Finger Herpes" occurs from "feeling up" any nasty dirty girlie holes.

My body is a sacred place, for holy stuff like Capri Sun juices, Lunchable Chicken Dunks, and Slim Jims (I like to snap into them!). The one thing that won't EVER go into my body? Girl slime! Touching it causes finger herpes!

Finger Herpes by Ethic_Hackman January 26, 2007