Richard Simmons

A guy who likes to wear sequinced tops and spandex shorts - a lot. Often known for his work-out videos, such as "Sweating to the Oldies", where he will be joined on stage with various fatties in the background. According to an A&E biography on him, he used to be an actor and referred to as "Dickie". He was also apparently always yearning for his father's attention (could explain some things). Has never actually gone out and said he was homosexual, but all signs seem to point to YES GAWD YES!

Richard Simmons exercise videos are funny in a disturbing way.

Richard Simmons by The awesome one December 13, 2004

summoning the genie 

Masturbation. Can be used for either males or females, as long as the act requires rubbing with a hand.

I spent all night summoning the genie when I shoulda been working on my term paper. Now it's going to be late and I have a hand cramp!

summoning the genie by FauxFoe February 15, 2018

ben simmons 

shoots bricks

ben Simmons cant shoot

ben simmons by LIL Kash September 16, 2020

simmons-it-in 

The act of parking your car in such a manner that a quick exit is possible. Even if it requires multiple maneuvers to achieve it.

"Hey, why you simmonsing your car now, we're just getting coffee?"

"Shut up and get out of the car and let me simmons-it-in!"

"Good shit, yo."

simmons-it-in by Anthony6869 June 11, 2008

Summoning the monkey 

Summoning the monkey: a euphemism for masturbation.

Originally coined by Liam O'Brien of the Critical Role D&D ensemble, and subsequently (maybe) made canon by DM Matt Mercer's explanation that summoning the monkey is the past time of many a wizard in their early years of training.

Sam: Have you seen Liam?
Laura: He's in the bathroom, probably summoning the monkey.
Sam: Thanks, I think I'll join him.

Summoning the monkey by Artagan000 May 3, 2021

Dentz or summing 

When you get Fifa 20 for Christmas

It was so “dentz or summing” when we got Fifa 20 for Christmas and got smashed by 9 goals on co-op seasons

Dentz or summing by YouAreABot December 27, 2019

Summoning Salt

The best speedrunning Youtuber out there. A Youtuber that is both famous and unknown.

"Have you ever heard of Summoning Salt?"

Summoning Salt by anonymous November 10, 2020