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pearl clutching 

The phrase "pearl clutching" means being shocked by something once-salacious that should now be seen as commonplace. It is used to dismiss someone as being prudish, uptight, or otherwise too conservative in their thinking
“Amusingly, upon the various perfume boards there’s been a little bit of pearl clutching going on about the concept of a marijuana perfume.”
pearl clutching by UrbanTourist October 8, 2016

Sir Clutchington

The person who's able to clutch so many things including exams, grades and whatever else is necessary. But this person does it with so much class that it deserves praise. Similar to Captain Clutch.
Many people tried but only one person could clutch it with such class. Sir Clutchington
Sir Clutchington by J-j-j-jay January 16, 2013

clutching at straws

Out of desparation, the act of reaching or stretching for a solution, no matter how irrational or inconsequential. Literally - a drowning person who, unable to find any substantial floatation immediately at had, attempts to save himself from certain death by grabbing hold of a few stray pieces of straw floating on the water within arm's length.
The Senator from Florida, caught red-handed sending lewd and lascivious text messages to underage male pages, was clutching at straws for an alibi and escape. Alcoholism? Resignation?
clutching at straws by Mark Caruso October 17, 2006

Cretching 

Alex White was caught cretching in his dorm room to the soft undertones of Jan Arden
Cretching by Big Bad Bud 1970 July 10, 2016

clutching your brownies 

"Clutching your brownies"
When two people want to be together but both are afraid to initiate it
Hey quit clutching your brownies and ask her out

Sclenching 

The act of holding in a fart you’re about to expel, in order to avoid obvious and general embarrassment. Usually they still squeeze out but with no sound and not as deadly.
Guy1: “omg last night with my gf I was holding in the biggest bomb when we were making out.”
Guy2: “you should have dropped that shit Hiroshima style.”
Guy1: “dude I like this girl, trust me I was sclenching mad… as soon as she left though my room smelt like Indian food cooking over burning hair with some garbage on top.”
Sclenching by HarveysPimp September 25, 2005