The Blastoise 

A sex move in which you jizz on a girl's face, then when she's about to go wash it off, you whip out your bitchin' twin supersoakers and blast it off her face with twin streams of superpowered water.

Boy: Hey whats your favorite pokemon?
Man: I don't play pokemon.
Boy: Oh. Mine's the Blastoise.
Man: Go to your room.

The Blastoise by BTLighting February 22, 2011

Blastoise 

When someone is very inebriated, to the point that being a Pokemon makes complete sense.

Dad: Son, where are you?
Son: Father, I am Blastoise
Dad: Oh, lol, have fun

Blastoise by Daski May 3, 2011

Blastoise 

Verb used during a game of Super Smash Brothers Melee when a Blastoise is being used to Pwn someone see Pwn

Man1: Holy Fucking Christ!
Man2: You so got Blastoised dude!

Blastoise by Chris Schanley March 22, 2005

Blastoise 

When you vomit and diarrhoea at the same time,

Shit I'm going to Blastoise I should take my clothes off and get in the bath so I don't make a mess everywhere

I took at shit the other day that stank so much I puked all down myself, it went on my dick, nasty Blastoise

Blastoise by phelm September 29, 2012

Blastoise 

The sexual act in where a man deprives himself of any sort of sexual activity for 3 months for the sole purpose of saving up sperm, then, with he's with his main biddie, he busts it all off on her face like a hydro pump!

"Yo that bitch Susmita? Yeah I gave her a fucking Blastoise, blat blat blat!"

Blastoise by Bloood October 30, 2010

blastoiseing 

When u puss all over your partner, whilst saying you don't have enough badges to train me.

I was blastoiseing my girl so hard last night.

blastoiseing by Bull111117 January 25, 2017

Blastoise King 

Homosexual, a slur used to someone who is an idiot and should shut up.

You are SO Blastoise king!

Blastoise King by Blastoise King April 19, 2006