pretend porn

Forms of media, especially YouTube videos or clickbait articles, that you know will not be pornographic but still somehow expect (and hope) to be pornographic, and then click on and/or watch, only to be disappointed and still horny.

Bro 1: Hey man, did you hear about that Buzzfeed video "Girls Use Vibrators For The First Time"?
Bro 2: Shit man, nah I didn't, I'll go check it out, I'm sure it's hot

ONE WEEK LATER

Bro 2: Brooo, they just went to the toy shop, bought vibrators, and then cut to the girls talking about using them afterward, and it wasn't sexy at all! That was some serious pretend porn.
Bro 1: Damn, you're right. Fuck pretend porn.

pretend porn by Loberson June 1, 2016

pretendimacy 

To pretend to be intimate therefore living lawless to the Devine love that produces intimate encounter.

They were all living a false life full of pretendimacy.

pretendimacy by Dead Goats February 9, 2018

Pretend

What most people in the world do. They smile at people/neighbors/coworkers they hate, they pretend to be joking or kidding with people they want dead, and they pretend to fight allies to try and convince their enemies that they are on opposite sides (for show). Most people would rather come to someone indirectly with a smile before they kill them than directly with their true intentions toward the other person, with no pretense or guile.

He/she knew how to pretend, which anybody could do really, but he/she wasn't too good at direct emotional honesty even at his/her most straightforward times.

Pretend by The Original Agahnim November 27, 2021

Pretendian

Any white person claiming to be Native American but has no ties to the culture or ethnic groups. Another term meaning the same thing would be 5$ Indian.

White Guy: My grandmother was an Aztec princess you can tell by my cheekbones and the stories she told me.

Any Sensible Person: You’re a pretendian.

Pretendian by nomorepretendians February 21, 2023

Google Pretend 

The act of googling something previously unknown or not yet understood & acting as if one knew all along.

Sally texts: "Banana peppers are amazing"
Joe Googles "Banana peppers"
Joe texts: "Yes I love them also :)" <-- Google Pretend

Google Pretend by siforek May 17, 2012

Les Pretend

Definition A;
A character from the Beano comic who pretends to be something every issue and dresses up like it, beginning with a martian in his debut.

Definition B,
Pretentious lesbian, some bitter girl who got screwed around by some asshole so she decides that she hates all men and refuses to date another, so she announces thats shes moving onto dating girls, even though shes not actually a true lesbian.

Example A;
'That Les Pretend is such a copying bastard'
Example B;
'wah wah, I hate all men, I'm gonna go date girls now'
'pfft, yeah thats right, tar all men with the same brush, friggin Les Pretend'

Les Pretend by Llihp Notwen April 15, 2013

I graciously pretend to agree. 

Abbreviation: IGPTA. A polite and playful way to acknowledge someone with whom one disagrees (especially a member of the opposite sex)

Mary: "I think this artwork would look so much better on THIS wall." John: "I graciously pretend to agree."

I graciously pretend to agree. by 1570Maple October 13, 2013