Danity
Kane is an American hippop (an unbelievably catchy blend of hop hip and/or pop) group created by
rapper, impresario, infamous philanderer, business tycoon, and compulsive
name-changer, Sean ‘Diddy’ Combs. Weshouldnotbe allowedtonameourselves is a spawn of hit reality show Making the Band and sees an assorted outfit of five ladies, who have recently released the second
single from their number one selling and number one underpromoted debut album Danity Kane: and We’ve Earned the Right to Record Because Diddy’s Made Us Cry on National TV.
The quintet’s second
single “Ride For You” is a mid-tempo ballad which features three of the five members each with their own solo verse: the first belongs to Aundrea Fimbres, the second to
Dawn Richard, and the third to Wanita (D. Woods) Woodgett. The names of the remaining two are
irrelevant as they apparently contribute little/or are permitted to contribute little, either way it’s minimal, to the group. The most memorable of the verses include “I was kicked off my part and squeezed onto the bridge, but I sang half of the cd as we recorded it, they say we have no lead singers” and “Diddy is a howmanyburgersistoomanyologist and the diagnosis is that I’m just one away, I can’t eat another ‘ger if I want to stay, why don’t you just straight out call me fat”. Initially stations were reluctant to play the record, but it is steadily gaining radio adds and spins as djs realize its high relatability, similar to the slow building popularity of their first thought-provoking and not in the least
bit materialistic
single “show stopper”.
Auditions for a fourth cycle of making the band are currently underway, and the show is set to
air spring of this year. Banners promoting the new season can be found cluttered on Danity Kane’s Myspace page. Oddly enough the banners are above promotion for Danity Kane’s own album. Also remarkable is Danity Kane’s friend list. Apparently whatabad
name members do not love themselves as much as they love Diddy and
rank subordinate to him on their own friend list.
Danity Kane
will be embarking on a new
journey, as they are scheduled to head the concert for Christina Aguilera’s 8-week tour along side fellow girl group Pussy Cat Dolls. Teenyboppers everywhere proclaimed the day Extreme Rapture Day on hearing the news that both groups would be included as opening acts for the gratuitously sexual singer Sex-
Tina.
Ournameiswack andlame agreed to do the tour in hopes to gain more exposure, esp. considering that promotion for their album was at a stand still.
Danity Kane (2006-?????)
