To follow a sloppy
night of drinking with an even sloppier night of
sex with "The Rick." Many a fateless (and most likely
now soulless) girls have unfortunely fallen into the
trap of mistaking The Rick's supposed charm at face value and overlooked that fact that they are far too intoxicated to truly be having any rational thoughts at this point. Unfortunetly for these poor ladies The Rick, due to his continuous sexcapades, plays host to more venerial diseases then a Vietnamese
prostitute. In fact, several of these sexually transmitted infections have began to mutate and fuse into a singular disease known amongst the medical community as a RTD (Rick Transmitted Disease). Although the true risk of catching a RTD is currently still unknown, the consequences - both physically and mentally - are most likely profound. It is our
hope as the community of Madison to pray that one
day our young girls
will ultimately realize the scope and breadth of this pandemic and furthermore refuse to partake in any sexual conduct with The Rick.