Taking a baby by the legs and bashing it into a wall. The Spartans did this to their defective children. Also follows the cult named The Brotherhood of Meef
Hey Achilles, have you MEEFED your child yet? No what does that mean? Well when a child is born and is retarded you take it by the legs and bash it into the wall, or as we call it Meefing. Ah I see I shall go do that now.
When attending a meeting so bad, dire or tiresome that an inner urge to issue profanities spills over into your exchange with colleagues or meeting obsessed morons.
Chair : and now shall we proceed on to any other business?
You : what the **** have we been ******* for the last two hours, I am wasting my ******* life here
Chair : you have Meeting Tourettes, please **** off
As the modern form of an ancient torture, death by 1000 meetings is defined as the annihilation of a project, action or ultimately a person due to time wasted in having to attend a seemingly infinite amount of non-productive meetings.
This is in direct correlation to the mathematical theory which states WORK = 1 / MEETINGS, as the amount of meetings increases, the amount of tangible work gets divided to oblivion.
Bob: What happened to the billion dollar R&D project that Joe was working on?
Mary: Death by 1000 meetings
Rick: Hey I thought you were working on that perpetual motion machine, why hasn't anything progressed in the last 3 years?
Jason: Death by 1000 meetings
Mark: Did you hear about the case of fiscal insolvency of a city over in California?
Ann: Sure did, yet another case of death by 1000 meetings!
Peak meeting is the point in time when the maximum rate of attention extraction is reached, after which the rate of attention enters terminal decline.
Attention extraction rate is not proportionate to the volume of input over time at any one said meeting. If nothing of importance is said in the first 10 minutes commence Coffee Break.
Equation:
Length of Meeting = Rate of Novelty + Caffeine Level (-Sleep Deprivation Amount) ---> When it trends negative, all communication ceases. Standard Deviation for an expired meeting is about 10 minutes.