Skip to main content

Smart Mash

How to play Smart Mash in just 7 easy steps.

1. Find the smartest person you know.

2. Bring some of your mates (male).

3. Choose your location and tie your allocated smart person up so they cannot move (a gag or tape is optional if you want to muffle the screams)

4. Cut (or use your own method) their head open exposing their healthy live brain.

5. Proceed to cut and mash their brain up inside the skull.

6. You all stand around the person's mashed brains and wank yourself off, last one to jizz / cum the losers punishment can be seen in step 7.

7. The loser of step 6 has to go first at eating the mashed up brains, out of your allocated persons skull.

First person to throw up is the loser.

Disclaimer: don't do this.
Hey guys want to play Smart Mash this weekend?
Smart Mash by Holygreywater September 27, 2018

smartmeshlows 

somebody who is smart and well educated

Same thing as smartmellow
you bunch of smartmeshlows
smartmeshlows by pncwords February 1, 2024

smartash 

Not to be confused with smartass.

A euphemism for "smartass" referring to an individual whose name begins with Ash.
Ashley's such a smartash. You can't say anything she doesn't already know.

bang a you-ee 

of Massachusetts orig. "to make a u-turn"
hey, we missed the bar, bang a you-ee
Word of the Day on July 19, 2026
The word 'flag' as pronounced by people with thick Belfast accents. The term is a perfect encapsulation of the disproportionate and overblown reaction to the removal of the Union Jack (as in 'de fleg') from above City Hall in Belfast. Where previously it had flown for 365 days per year, it is now flown on 17 designated days of the year - in line with many other British cities.

The event caused a portion of the Protestant community ('fleggers') to make international pricks of themselves as they proceeded to wreck the fucking place, claiming it was another erosion of a 'British' identity they perceive to have been under attack since the horrifying spectre of equality reared its head in Northern Ireland.

The word 'fleg' - and indeed 'fleggers' - fittingly describes a section of humanity unconcerned with knowledge, reality or the vagaries of the English language. Like America's tea-baggers they are ruled by instinct, fear and paranoia with a side dish of rampant bigotry and startling ignorance of the world around them.
"Wat de fuck like! The taigs got de fleg took down! Let's wreck de fuckin place! No surrender!"

"De fleg has been took down! Before ye know it there'll be a united Ireland! Attack Short Strand! God Save The Queen!"
Fleg by OnionFleg August 9, 2013
Word of the Day on July 18, 2026
To take something small, that doesn't quite qualify as a theft. Probably from the Danish "skæv" or the Dutch "scheef", both of which are pronounced similarly, meaning "askew, or not quite right'. To change an item's ownership without permission, but only something small and of little worth.
"I skeefed an apple off the neighbor's tree." "I skeefed some chips outta your bag when you looked away." "Don't skeef my chair when I go to the bathroom."
Skeef by kachinaflonk July 16, 2026
Word of the Day on July 17, 2026

Hair spider

A tight, tangled knot of loose hair and lint that forms inside clothing during the clothes dryer cycle. It typically hides inside garments, causing an annoying lump or a phantom tickling sensation against the skin until it is found or falls out onto the floor during folding.
I was folding my clothes and a huge hair spider fell out onto my hand
Hair spider by Kmorsels July 15, 2026
Word of the Day on July 16, 2026