Toddlered

A state of drunkeness when you can't speak coherently, lose control of your bladder and/or bowels, can't hold your own head up, and generally need someone to take care of you and babysit you.

Last night Johnny got toddlered.

Toddlered by Jesykahb August 11, 2014

toddler rage 

When a toddler has reached the end of their patience & flies into a rage.

The toddler said, Fun room! Fun room! (His brothers' room with video games). They kept their door shut & he always wanted to go in there. He flew into a toddler rage & kicked a hole in the door & said "I wish I was wearing boots so I could've kicked a bigger hole!" He totally kicked the door off its hinges 3 or 4 times! He'd reached the end of his patience.

toddler rage by Starchylde May 25, 2016

Toddlers Socks 

Tits that look like a toddlers socks

Small empty and dangling

Usually belonging to a skinny mom with a few kids

She had tits like a toddlers socks

Toddlers Socks by Working Class Hero December 4, 2020

Toddler Hands

When a grown man has freakishly small hands like a toddler.

Look he can barely hold a cup, his toddler hands are too small to hold the handle.

Toddler Hands by dawnnhelene October 27, 2011

Toddler 

A 60-90cm tall human who has exited the “aaaaw” phase and entered the “awfuuuuuuuck” phase. Generally have no respect or regard for anything and unwittingly forces its parents into alcoholism. They don’t sleep, don’t eat food, however they do have a nak for interior design using simple tools such as crayons, lipstick and eyeliner. They are the second most common cause of hypertension and first most common cause of liver serrosis. toddler

Shit Jim, you look like you’ve had a bender this morning! “ don’t be silly Cheryl, I got totally toddlered last night, the little bastard didn’t sleep until 2am” toddler

Toddler by that_guy_from_brizzie November 21, 2017

toddler-whipped 

The state of being completely and totally beholden to the whim and caprice of your toddler, to the extent that you make virtually all life decisions based not on your own personal preferences but to avoid a toddler melt-down.

When Bill told his friend Stu that he could not stay at work to finish an important project, because he did not want to miss phase 3 of his son’s potty-training class, Stu said, “dude, you are totally toddler-whipped.”

toddler-whipped by jesshtx September 9, 2006

Horny Toddler 

A full grown and physically mature adult (18+) who is still a either still a virgin, a premature ejaculator or just plain sexually inexperienced.

GIRL, I threw myself at that horny toddler from the Popeyes Drive thru, we fucked for like 1.5 pumps and then he wanted to be held and shit.

Horny Toddler by Ranchgirls November 2, 2020