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tanukisanyo's definitions

celebrity

Relative term for someone who is known by people who have never met them because they have done something worth talking about or putting in the media.

For example, you may hear about a guy who saved a drowning baby in your city, but no one outside of you county has heard of him. So celebrity is a relative term.

Most people usually only think of celebrities as the kind who are in the entertainment industry, because they are the best known, and even if they fade out of mainstream, they will usually still have cult status.

The guy who saves the baby, if he makes national news, will be popular for maybe a week or two, then no one will give a damn anymore.

People with the more stable celebrity status are not just entertainers, but also politicians and bussinessmen. Can anyone honestly say that Bill Gates and George W. Bush aren`t celebrities? But they never had to sing or act.

Also, people should not hate on celebrities so much. Not all of them are bad, and most of the things people complain about(ie all the other definitions for celebrity) are not the real problems with them anyway.

People who hate celebrities are just jealous. There is not any need to be jealous, and celeb-haters will pretend to agree with that because they are just insecure losers who take refuge by being poser and by dissing people they know are better than them.

Celebrities are no different from anyone else. The only reason ignorant assholes think so is because you are obviously going to hear more about the guy who buys half and island is obviously going to draw more media attention than the guy who goes to help in Africa for a month(unless its Bono).

Problems with celebrities are the people`s fault, not the celebrities. Not that they are not responsible for themselves, but it is societies fault that the jackasses get famous.

You(being a moron) are jealous of celebrity. So you are more interested in the story where he is DUI than the story about him donating $100,000 to fight cancer. Surveys are taken all over the country, showing that assholes like you prefer the negative stuff. The mass media wants best possible ratings, so they show the bad stuff the most, and mostly follow the celebrities who always screw up.

Level of celebrity is about fame(generally caused by media attention) more than by money.

I can personally guarantee you that more Americans have heard of Eminem than Ross Perot, who has more money.

And you are also an idiot if you think celebrities cause people do be poor. Give poor people their money, how retarded are you? Who do you think gives celebrities money. Not all poor people are stuck being poor. Some are poor because they spend more money to go to the movies that they should be saving for rent. Instead, they get evicted. And it is their fault not some celebrity who just made a movie.

Celebrities` popularity is also the whole reason they get payed so much. They used to just get a flat paycheck, until Danny DeVito realized it makes no sense for the producers to make more profit based on the movie`s success, and that actors should to. He demanded to take a percentage for his role as the Penguin in Batman Returns, and actors have been payed this way ever since.

You hear a new movie stars Jennifer Lopez and Chris Rock(this is hypothetical) so you make sure to get to the movie even though it doesn`t sound very interesting. It sucks, but makes $40.6 million in box offices thanks to people like you who watch it just because of the celebrities who you claim to hate, but really wish you were them because you know how worthless your own pathetic life is.

Also, they aren`t all lazy, not that there is a problem with being lazy. Being lazy is only bad if you need money but are just sitting around doing nothing instead of trying to make money, then blaming your poorness on the system.

If your are poor enough that you have to chastise celebrities, you should be out working instead of spending money you don`t have for and internet connection to bitch about how everyone else is better than you.
Loser`s thoughts: Damn. I am ugly and poor. Justin Timberlake is rich and famous, and gets all the chicks. I wish I was him. His music is awesome, too. But I can`t let my friends know, I have to keep up this hardcore gangsta image of mine. If it comes up, I`ll just call him a deushbag and blame him for societies problems. I`m popular enough that they`ll even pretend to agree!
by tanukisanyo June 10, 2005
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SMAPxSMAP

SMAP`s TV show on MONDAY nights at 11pm on channel 3(just in my area-i think the network its on is NHK, maybe TV Tokyo).
Includes cooking, skits, dancing, and musical comedy sketches.

*you do not pronounce the "x", it is just said "SMAP SMAP" or in Japanese pronunciation "sumappusumappu"
Me: I gotta get home so I can watch eat dinner and watch SMAPxSMAP.
Miki: SMAPxSMAP? Yesterday.
Me: You mean it is on Monday? Not Tuesday?
Miki: Yes.
Me: Fuck.
by tanukisanyo May 10, 2005
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sexual harassment

1. Persistent unwanted romantic advances
2. Any act that can be perceived by the receiving party as a sexual advance
3. A sexual advance
1. Girl: I told you I already have a boyfriend.
Obessessed Loser: But I love you! Please marry me.
Chick: Hell no! Go away, damnit!

2. Girl 2: How the hell did you get my dress, and why are you rubbing it?
Laundromat Guy: You just handed it to me, ma`am. I`m just getting this sticker off, like you asked me to.

3. a-when one little panda pulls on another little panda`s unerwear. That makes me a sad panda.
b-when one little panda sticks his furry little willy in another little panda`s ear. That makes me a very sad panda.
c- Girl 3: Did you just slap my ass and say "Break me off a peice of that"?
Dude: Sorry, is that what I said? What I meant to say is "I want to take you back to my place and get anal". Is that better?
by tanukisanyo May 9, 2005
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Michelle Branch

Pop singer who is talented vocally, but not a particularly good composer.

Music is not great, but being from the Southwest(specifically Arizona) automatically classifies her in the awesome column.

Grew up in Sedona, AZ, where she used to babysit for my friend, the 8or.
Michelle Branch sings so good, to bad her music is crappy "guitar pop".

Me: Did you see hear the new Michelle Branch album?
J: Yeah...it sucked ass, just like all her music.
Me: How naive are you? Don`t you see? The point is not the quality of the music. Rather, what matters is that she is from the Southwest. THAT is true talent.
J: Being from the Southwest takes talent?
Me: Of course. Haven`t you checked out the heat?

Michelle used to baby sit and do local gigs in Sedona.
by tanukisanyo May 18, 2005
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the awesome column

1. category into which anything awesome fits. specifically what is awesome in your individual opinion, not what is popular. The awesome column does NOT mean what is "in" at any given time

2.person who is in favor of something awesome

3.PROBABLY comes from being "in (politician)`s column" which means you favor them and/or vote for them
1.Ozzy Osbourne...still in the tabloids, still in the awesome column

2.Mike is only 12 years old, but he bought every Beastie Boys album, thus putting him in the awesome column

3.Judging by his name, I would guess that Bradford Charleston is in the Bush Column. On the other hand Mad Man Johnson is probably in the Kerry column.
by tanukisanyo May 19, 2005
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The Axe Effect

What happens when you wear Axe.

Does not help you get past bad looks if you are to ugly, but wearing Axe means you do not have to be smooth.

Effectiveness decreases with amount of Axe used. It works best with just a spritz.
Too much, on the other hand, could keep Johnny Depp from getting laid.
See also The Axe Defect
Do not press the button down all the way.

PRESSURE:
You should hear a gentle "pssss" sound if there is not background noise.
If you can hear a loud "PSSHHT" sound that interrupts the local shoot-out, you are using to much Axe.

TIME: 1 second per pit, .5 seconds anywhere else.

FREQUENCY: No more than twice within 24 hours, except in the case of extreme physical exertion, in which case the limit should be 4 times.
by tanukisanyo June 12, 2005
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Gai Maitou

1.The best martial arts instructor ever!
Close personal friend of The King(Bruce Campbell) and the Master(Ving Rhames.

2.When Gai Maitou is not instucting the best martial arts ever or being friends with the King and the Master, he is one of the best characters in Naruto manga and anime.

He totally made Rock Lee who is today by taking him under his wing, giving him confidence, teaching him the importance of youth, and teaching him to kick serious ass, using only taijutsus(attacks that use physical energy istead of chakura).

He also turned Rock Lee into his clone.

His main moral code is that you must do everything within your power to protect any people who are important to you.

see also Gai Sensei
1.Me: Today, my house.
Marathon of awexome.
Naruto, Evil Dead 2, Dawn of the Dead, then fireworks. BYOB.

2.Lee: Gai Sensei......
Gai Sensei: Lee......
Lee: Gai Sensei......
Gai Sensei: Lee......
Lee: Gai Sensei......
Gai Sensei: Lee......
by tanukisanyo May 9, 2005
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