The act of putting a thumb over the mouth of a bottle of champagne and then agitating it order to bring it to the highest possible pressure. The bottle is then thrust into the anus of an unsuspecting girl (or, preferrably, a sleeping whore), thereby shooting champagne into her rectal cavity violently.
Generally, the finer the whore, the finer the champagne that should be used. In the case of a 4 dollar "ho", malt liquor may be used.
Generally, the finer the whore, the finer the champagne that should be used. In the case of a 4 dollar "ho", malt liquor may be used.
"The recoil from that rude awakening was quite a mess."
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The malt liquor must have fermented in her ass after the rude awakening, because I went to work drunk after that 9 AM rim job.
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"The prostitute wanted to charge me extra after I gave her a rude awakening, but I told her to f' off and left. She couldn't get up without malt liquor leaking out her ass, so she made an un-hasty chase."
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"I rushed my rude awakening and hit the wrong hole. Wouldn't have been so bad if she wasn't on the menses at the time. Let's just say there was cotton and chunks of blood everywhere.
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The malt liquor must have fermented in her ass after the rude awakening, because I went to work drunk after that 9 AM rim job.
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"The prostitute wanted to charge me extra after I gave her a rude awakening, but I told her to f' off and left. She couldn't get up without malt liquor leaking out her ass, so she made an un-hasty chase."
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"I rushed my rude awakening and hit the wrong hole. Wouldn't have been so bad if she wasn't on the menses at the time. Let's just say there was cotton and chunks of blood everywhere.
by scorpionmintred October 01, 2005
Get the rude awakening mug.When you put corn in a woman's vagina and grind it as with a mortar and pestle, except in this case it is her pussy and your cock.
You must be wary that corn doesn't get wedged around the head of your penis as it does in your teeth after you eat it.
By going down on your woman afterwards, it gives a whole new meaning to "creamed corn".
You must be wary that corn doesn't get wedged around the head of your penis as it does in your teeth after you eat it.
By going down on your woman afterwards, it gives a whole new meaning to "creamed corn".
Little did anyone at the thanksgiving table know, but the creamed corn was made by grinding the corn in my girlfriend's twat just earlier.
by scorpionmintred August 15, 2004
Get the Grinding the Corn mug.When a woman is passed out, either from her own actions or by way of your rufies, the act of fucking her in the ass wildly and then drawing doodles on her sheets using your feces-stained penis.
These actions may be repeated until said drawing is complete.
These actions may be repeated until said drawing is complete.
That passed out bitch didn't appreciate that I ass crayoned her bed.
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I have a wicked yeast infection in my foreskin from using my ass crayon too much.
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I have a wicked yeast infection in my foreskin from using my ass crayon too much.
by scorpionmintred December 28, 2003
Get the ass crayon mug.1. (n.) The ape whom once conquered hot-air-ballooning, as only man had previously done.
2. (v.) The act of, upon ejaculating into a woman of ill-repute, jamming as many bananas as possible into her vagina. The man then whips out a spoon, takes a scoop, and offers the woman a serving of the mashed bananas. She then declines, and runs from the room screaming. The man then consumes the spoonful, takes his briefcase, and leaves.
2. (v.) The act of, upon ejaculating into a woman of ill-repute, jamming as many bananas as possible into her vagina. The man then whips out a spoon, takes a scoop, and offers the woman a serving of the mashed bananas. She then declines, and runs from the room screaming. The man then consumes the spoonful, takes his briefcase, and leaves.
"God Bless that Ape Wellington for showing us all that extremely boring balloon flight is possible!"
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Friend: "Do you smell bananas?"
Woman: "No."
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Woman: "Have you found the problem?"
OBGYN: "No, but this here is delicious."
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Tickles Brick Tickles: "Honey! Come back! I thought you would enjoy it!"
Woman: "Why?"
Tickles Brick Tickles: "At least your twat doesn't smell like fish."
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Ape: "Wunhh wunhh wooo wooo!"
Woman (to self): "O, why did I ever have sex with an ape? He has no idea what goes where!"
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Friend: "Do you smell bananas?"
Woman: "No."
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Woman: "Have you found the problem?"
OBGYN: "No, but this here is delicious."
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Tickles Brick Tickles: "Honey! Come back! I thought you would enjoy it!"
Woman: "Why?"
Tickles Brick Tickles: "At least your twat doesn't smell like fish."
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Ape: "Wunhh wunhh wooo wooo!"
Woman (to self): "O, why did I ever have sex with an ape? He has no idea what goes where!"
by scorpionmintred February 27, 2009
Get the Ape Wellington mug.by scorpionmintred December 28, 2003
Get the Count Von Pennies mug.1. Angry cow. (Possibly see your mom).
2. BSE; Rots the brains of cows and jerks who eat cow brains. (Possibly see Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. Or was that monkey brains? Whatever, it's feking weird anyway).
3. Giant lesbian who thinks she's hot. When you yank on her quadruple D breasts, she does not notice it because they're dragging on the floor already. But for some reason, skinny hot lesbians find her attractive, but she is mad because men still exist, and her vagina cannot be found by said skinny hot lesbian. If you are a man, she will not appreciate you existing.
2. BSE; Rots the brains of cows and jerks who eat cow brains. (Possibly see Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. Or was that monkey brains? Whatever, it's feking weird anyway).
3. Giant lesbian who thinks she's hot. When you yank on her quadruple D breasts, she does not notice it because they're dragging on the floor already. But for some reason, skinny hot lesbians find her attractive, but she is mad because men still exist, and her vagina cannot be found by said skinny hot lesbian. If you are a man, she will not appreciate you existing.
Your mom might be mad cow type one, but she can't be mad cow type two unless your dad had sex with a straight woman who carried you to term. Unless you are a girl, then your mom may be touching you when you're asleep, on the boobies, perhaps.
by scorpionmintred December 30, 2003
Get the mad cow mug.by scorpionmintred December 28, 2003
Get the HIV Lane mug.