I am the Clit Commander. No one rules the clit like me; not this fuck, none of you little fucks out there. I AM THE CLIT COMMANDER! When it comes down to takin' care of business, here's what I do. I grab it...then I put on my nose like this...and im like, "OH youz little fuck..."
by porneggs May 31, 2006
Get the clit commander mug.a term used when someone is clearly getting too worked up or emotional or starts spilling beer on your new jeans.
by porneggs September 11, 2005
Get the yo relax mug.The 1 - 4 scale was devised by several brilliant minds who grew increasingly frustrated with the inherent subjectivity of rating women on a 1-10 scale of fuckability. Hence, the 1 - 4 scale was created to avoid the dubious, yet frequent dilemma of distinguishing between a "9" an 8.4" a "3.4" etc. The genius of the 1 -4 scale is that it employs a categorical, objective system generally agreed upon by most heterosexual males (and lipstick lesbians, not the butch ones).
Without further ado, here is the breakdown of categories:
A "1": This category is designated for females who you un-mistakenably, undoubtedly, and unabashedly would not have sex with, even in your most inebriated, depressed and lonely state. The "1" is generally characterized by the lethal combination of an ugly face, extreme obesity and very low self-confidence.
The "2":
This category is interesting because a lot more variables come into play here. The "2" is agreed upon to be generally unattractive however due to a variety of circumstances (i.e. shes a butter face, decent face with a fat body, or you have a fetish for 14 year old Malaysian prostitutes), you will have sex with her if you are drunk enough. The key here is that nobody finds out. You make sure you keep this one to yourself.
The "3":
Simultaneously the easiest, yet most problematic category to define. The "3", very broadly put, is a legitimately attractive female who you would unashamedly have sex with. The "3" is worthy of bragging rights, perhaps even girlfriend material, if you're a pussy like that. This is probably the best you're going to ever do.
the "4":
The "4" is distinct and should not be thrown around lightly. To put it in the words of one of the founding fathers of the 1-4 scale, "this girl is so hot, you would kill your own mother and piss on her grave just to smell this girl's shit." While killing is a little extreme (given the nature of our court system and their increasing willingness to play the "hard line" on parent killings), it puts into context the magnitude of what the "4" represents. This girl is so out of your league, you avoid eye contact at all costs. "4's" represent under 1% of the female population, and you most likely will never insert your penis in one.
Without further ado, here is the breakdown of categories:
A "1": This category is designated for females who you un-mistakenably, undoubtedly, and unabashedly would not have sex with, even in your most inebriated, depressed and lonely state. The "1" is generally characterized by the lethal combination of an ugly face, extreme obesity and very low self-confidence.
The "2":
This category is interesting because a lot more variables come into play here. The "2" is agreed upon to be generally unattractive however due to a variety of circumstances (i.e. shes a butter face, decent face with a fat body, or you have a fetish for 14 year old Malaysian prostitutes), you will have sex with her if you are drunk enough. The key here is that nobody finds out. You make sure you keep this one to yourself.
The "3":
Simultaneously the easiest, yet most problematic category to define. The "3", very broadly put, is a legitimately attractive female who you would unashamedly have sex with. The "3" is worthy of bragging rights, perhaps even girlfriend material, if you're a pussy like that. This is probably the best you're going to ever do.
the "4":
The "4" is distinct and should not be thrown around lightly. To put it in the words of one of the founding fathers of the 1-4 scale, "this girl is so hot, you would kill your own mother and piss on her grave just to smell this girl's shit." While killing is a little extreme (given the nature of our court system and their increasing willingness to play the "hard line" on parent killings), it puts into context the magnitude of what the "4" represents. This girl is so out of your league, you avoid eye contact at all costs. "4's" represent under 1% of the female population, and you most likely will never insert your penis in one.
Me: "Hey dude, how did last night go?"
Roommate: "Not bad, brought a girl home"
Me: "Nice. She a 3?"
Roommate: "No, i'd say like a 7/10"
Me: "Listen cock-smoker, the 1-10 scale is for fucking amateurs, what is she on the 1 - 4 scale we discussed?"
Roommate: "Oh..I'd say mid-to-high 2ish"
Me: "werd"
Roommate: "Not bad, brought a girl home"
Me: "Nice. She a 3?"
Roommate: "No, i'd say like a 7/10"
Me: "Listen cock-smoker, the 1-10 scale is for fucking amateurs, what is she on the 1 - 4 scale we discussed?"
Roommate: "Oh..I'd say mid-to-high 2ish"
Me: "werd"
by porneggs March 01, 2009
Get the The 1 - 4 scale mug.derived from Chappelle Show character Clayton Bigsby, it is a deviation of the word "Nayger", which means "nigger."
Usually used as a salute, or to acknowledge one of your friends.
Usually used as a salute, or to acknowledge one of your friends.
by Porneggs May 23, 2006
Get the naygrum mug.Ace-Deuce,aka "Ace, Two" is a starting hand in Texas Hold-em, which is deceptively good because you have an ace, but it's really a pile of crap. It will fuck you over a lot, especially if someone else has an Ace with any card higher than a two.
Someone else; " I got two pair, aces and nines, what do you have?"
me: "Ace-deuce, fuck. I fucking hate ace-deuce."
me: "Ace-deuce, fuck. I fucking hate ace-deuce."
by porneggs September 21, 2005
Get the ace-deuce mug.Acronym, standing for Titties by Default. Refers to the massive protrusions of fatty tissue present in the chest area of overweight women, and occasionaly men. Not to be confused with BAT's (bomb-ass titties), Titties by Default are not composed of breast tissue, but rather an inevitable dispersion of fat cells throughout the bodies of those afflicted. While TBD's are responsible for giving fat women a false sense of confidence and self worth, they are equally capable of deceiving unsuspecting onlookers, and masquerading as BAT's.
Stel: "Holy shit, that girl eating the nacho plate to herself has PHENOMENAL breasts. I can't stop staring"
Me "No dude, they're TBD's. If I was 3 bills I would have phenomenal breasts too."
Me "No dude, they're TBD's. If I was 3 bills I would have phenomenal breasts too."
by porneggs November 11, 2010
Get the TBD's mug.Usually used by old Indians/Pakistanis as an obscenity (usually directed at white people). Coined from the term "son of a bitch", this south-asian derivative has the same message, yet combines an undeniably funny accent.
"Allo?"
"ummm hey...may I please speak with Sharanjit?"
"Who's dis?"
"...It's his friend Mark..."
"listen you sun-mabitch....you call my house one more time I call police....you vucking bestard!"
"umm.....so he's not home???"
"ummm hey...may I please speak with Sharanjit?"
"Who's dis?"
"...It's his friend Mark..."
"listen you sun-mabitch....you call my house one more time I call police....you vucking bestard!"
"umm.....so he's not home???"
by porneggs May 24, 2006
Get the sun-mabitch mug.