nicholas d's definitions
"A big fine woman'll make you smile when she pass you
Damn that girl sexy, her mamma got ass too."
-Juvenile, "Mamma Got Ass"
Steve: "Maaan, this party at Wellington's house is going to suck baaaalllls."
Kevin: "Word to your mother. Working for that guy is a bitch. I can only imagine what that old stiff's family is like."
*Ding Dong*
Hot girl: "Hello, I'm Mr. Wellington's daughter Tiffany."
Steve: "BAZOOING! Damn that girl is hot!"
Kevin: "No kidding dude. I didn't expect old Wellington's daughter to have ass like that. Did you see the rack on that smokin' piece of tail?"
Steve: "Hell yeah man! I'd love to give those tig ol' bitties a good motorboating."
Mr. Wellington (having overheard): "Ahem...speaking of having ass, how about you two have your asses out of the office by Monday? You're fired."
Damn that girl sexy, her mamma got ass too."
-Juvenile, "Mamma Got Ass"
Steve: "Maaan, this party at Wellington's house is going to suck baaaalllls."
Kevin: "Word to your mother. Working for that guy is a bitch. I can only imagine what that old stiff's family is like."
*Ding Dong*
Hot girl: "Hello, I'm Mr. Wellington's daughter Tiffany."
Steve: "BAZOOING! Damn that girl is hot!"
Kevin: "No kidding dude. I didn't expect old Wellington's daughter to have ass like that. Did you see the rack on that smokin' piece of tail?"
Steve: "Hell yeah man! I'd love to give those tig ol' bitties a good motorboating."
Mr. Wellington (having overheard): "Ahem...speaking of having ass, how about you two have your asses out of the office by Monday? You're fired."
by Nicholas D February 27, 2011
Get the have assmug. A person whose main goal in life is to post first on an internet video, picture, or anything else that allows comments. Usually this person will simply post "First!" or something along those lines rather than making an insightful or meaningful comment. First posters, while they themselves often believe that they are serving a valuable purpose and/or accomplishing something by being first, are generally disrespected by much of the rest of the online community.
First poster #1: "I was the first to post on a Failblog picture on March 17, 2008. It ended up getting 946 comments."
Neil Armstrong: "Wow, that's really impressive. I was the first person to walk on the moon."
Babe Ruth: "I was the first player to hit 60 home runs in a season AND the first to hit 700 career home runs!"
Albert Einstein: "Well I was the first to prove the relationship between mass and energy as well as many other fundamental principles of the universe that had puzzled scientists since the beginning of time."
Sir Edmund Hillary: "I was the first to climb Mt. Everest."
First poster #1: "What did you do up there?"
Sir Edmund Hillary: "I put up a sign that said 'First!!!' and got my ass back down that mountain. It was freezing up there, dude!"
God: "Well I was the first to create, well, you know, everything in the entire universe."
First poster #2: "Sweet man, congrats. I was the first to comment on that YouTube video of the news anchor accidentally saying 'blow job' on live TV."
Neil Armstrong: "LOL! That video was classic! Epic fail!"
Other commenter: "Shut up, all of you!!! Nobody cares if you're first! Get a life!"
Neil Armstrong: "Wow, that's really impressive. I was the first person to walk on the moon."
Babe Ruth: "I was the first player to hit 60 home runs in a season AND the first to hit 700 career home runs!"
Albert Einstein: "Well I was the first to prove the relationship between mass and energy as well as many other fundamental principles of the universe that had puzzled scientists since the beginning of time."
Sir Edmund Hillary: "I was the first to climb Mt. Everest."
First poster #1: "What did you do up there?"
Sir Edmund Hillary: "I put up a sign that said 'First!!!' and got my ass back down that mountain. It was freezing up there, dude!"
God: "Well I was the first to create, well, you know, everything in the entire universe."
First poster #2: "Sweet man, congrats. I was the first to comment on that YouTube video of the news anchor accidentally saying 'blow job' on live TV."
Neil Armstrong: "LOL! That video was classic! Epic fail!"
Other commenter: "Shut up, all of you!!! Nobody cares if you're first! Get a life!"
by Nicholas D July 27, 2009
Get the first postermug. A term referring to someone who fronts like he/she is down with the hood but has in reality led a privileged upper- or upper-middle class existence for most of his/her life. Comes from the ridiculous song of the same name by J-Lo, who is a known prima donna and knows next to nothing about life in the ghetto.
Dave (after making shot and getting fouled): "And one."
Kevin: "What?!? Like hell I fouled you on that!"
Dave: "Who cares, man? I schooled your ass anyway. Count it."
Kevin: "Whoa. You better check yo self, dogg. You can't be calling that shit in street ball games. Somebody would bust a cap in your ass. You're lucky I didn't pack heat today."
Dave: "Ha, like you know anything about street ball."
Kevin: "I've been around, man. I used to play in a game where like half of the people were black."
Dave: "Wow. Did you really just say that?"
Bill: "Yeah, I bet you got into some really rough games growing up in that $5 million mansion in Atherton."
Kevin: "Whatever. I also played ball with our landscapers all the time as a kid and they were straight from the barrio, muchachos."
Dave: "Dude..."
Bill: "Give it a rest, Kevin. Nobody buys your bullshit. We all know you're a total jenny from the block."
Kevin: "What?!? Like hell I fouled you on that!"
Dave: "Who cares, man? I schooled your ass anyway. Count it."
Kevin: "Whoa. You better check yo self, dogg. You can't be calling that shit in street ball games. Somebody would bust a cap in your ass. You're lucky I didn't pack heat today."
Dave: "Ha, like you know anything about street ball."
Kevin: "I've been around, man. I used to play in a game where like half of the people were black."
Dave: "Wow. Did you really just say that?"
Bill: "Yeah, I bet you got into some really rough games growing up in that $5 million mansion in Atherton."
Kevin: "Whatever. I also played ball with our landscapers all the time as a kid and they were straight from the barrio, muchachos."
Dave: "Dude..."
Bill: "Give it a rest, Kevin. Nobody buys your bullshit. We all know you're a total jenny from the block."
by Nicholas D January 18, 2012
Get the jenny from the blockmug. A phrase that signifies that a person's prior remark could have been interpreted sexually while also insulting the (presumably male) speaker. Means that no woman would ever say such a thing about that person because it would be blatantly untrue. If the target of the comment is female, the related saying that's what he didn't say should be used.
Tim: "Hey man, check out big-ass bag of weed I scored from Sampson. Let's blaze this shit up."
Dave: "Wow, I've never seen one that big!"
Tim: "That's what she didn't say!"
Dave: "Ah, you got me there. I guess everyone knows I have a 3-inch penis."
Tim: "Well, I was just joking, but they do now!"
Dave: "Wow, I've never seen one that big!"
Tim: "That's what she didn't say!"
Dave: "Ah, you got me there. I guess everyone knows I have a 3-inch penis."
Tim: "Well, I was just joking, but they do now!"
by Nicholas D December 18, 2012
Get the that's what she didn't saymug. Short for avatar, i.e. a computer representation of a person. Cannot be used as a short form for the movie "Avatar."
Lloyd: "Dude, stop making your av crouch over my av's corpse like he's taking a dump on it. That move's getting old."
Harry: "Sorry, not happening. Cleveland steamer comin' right up!"
Lloyd: "Hey man, have you seen 'Av' yet?"
Harry: "What the hell is 'Av'? 'Avenue Q'? Avril Lavigne? 'Alien vs. Predator'?"
Lloyd: "No, 'Avatar' obviously."
Harry: "Sorry dude, as an officer of the grammar police I'm going to have to cite you on that illegal abbreviation. You can pay me the $100 fine anytime."
Lloyd: "What? I don't owe you..."
Harry: (pulls out gun) "Break yo self, fool!"
Harry: "Sorry, not happening. Cleveland steamer comin' right up!"
Lloyd: "Hey man, have you seen 'Av' yet?"
Harry: "What the hell is 'Av'? 'Avenue Q'? Avril Lavigne? 'Alien vs. Predator'?"
Lloyd: "No, 'Avatar' obviously."
Harry: "Sorry dude, as an officer of the grammar police I'm going to have to cite you on that illegal abbreviation. You can pay me the $100 fine anytime."
Lloyd: "What? I don't owe you..."
Harry: (pulls out gun) "Break yo self, fool!"
by Nicholas D September 10, 2011
Get the avmug. Jared: "Oh man, don't tell me these jokers are trying to get high off the Reddi-Wip can again."
Reggie: "Yeah, the hell with that shit. I've got a fat bag of grass we can smoke back at my place. Let's blow this bitch."
Jared: "Word to your mother."
Reggie: "Yeah, the hell with that shit. I've got a fat bag of grass we can smoke back at my place. Let's blow this bitch."
Jared: "Word to your mother."
by Nicholas D December 24, 2007
Get the blow this bitchmug. To hold up two fingers with the intent of signifying that you have to drop a deuce, i.e. take a crap.
Johnson: "Now Frank, you have to cut the green wire first. Go ahead and do that now."
Frank: "Ok, cutting the green wire. Here goes nothing...got it! What's next?"
Johnson: "You're doing great, Frankie. How much time do we have left?"
Frank: "One minute, forty-seven seconds til she blows."
Johnson: "Now cut the blue wire. Once you do that, there's only one more step until the bomb is disarmed."
Frank: "I can barely see down here...ok, blue wire, blue wire...I think this is it. Cutting now...ok, we're clear. What now, Johnson?"
Johnson (in the background): "Oh shit! Agnes, get the phone for me."
Frank: "Johnson!!! Are you there?"
Johnson's secretary: "Sorry hon, I just saw him flash the deuce. My guess is he'll be on the crapper for the next 10 minutes or so. Today was the office chili con carne festival. You'd better call back later."
Frank: "But we have to dismantle this bomb!!!"
Johnson's secretary: "Um yeah...I wouldn't know anything about that. I suggest you try calling back around...oh...maybe 3:30 this afternoon. Buh-bye now."
Frank: "Ok, cutting the green wire. Here goes nothing...got it! What's next?"
Johnson: "You're doing great, Frankie. How much time do we have left?"
Frank: "One minute, forty-seven seconds til she blows."
Johnson: "Now cut the blue wire. Once you do that, there's only one more step until the bomb is disarmed."
Frank: "I can barely see down here...ok, blue wire, blue wire...I think this is it. Cutting now...ok, we're clear. What now, Johnson?"
Johnson (in the background): "Oh shit! Agnes, get the phone for me."
Frank: "Johnson!!! Are you there?"
Johnson's secretary: "Sorry hon, I just saw him flash the deuce. My guess is he'll be on the crapper for the next 10 minutes or so. Today was the office chili con carne festival. You'd better call back later."
Frank: "But we have to dismantle this bomb!!!"
Johnson's secretary: "Um yeah...I wouldn't know anything about that. I suggest you try calling back around...oh...maybe 3:30 this afternoon. Buh-bye now."
by Nicholas D June 17, 2008
Get the flash the deucemug.