mike payne's definitions

storing tuna

An excuse for getting caught cheating

When Jason came home at 5 a.m. and his wife wanted to smell his privates, he told her he was storing tuna.

by Mike Payne March 11, 2008

family switch

When the classic switch is performed by two members of the same family.

When Adam and his father Harry were double teaming Debbie and they performed the family switch, Adam noted that she did not have to travel to Paris to visit the Eiffel Tower.

by Mike Payne March 6, 2008

cherry smuggler

A synonym of grape smuggler for the better-endowed.

By the way Jason strutted across the beach, you could tell that he considered himself a cherry smuggler.

by Mike Payne March 3, 2008

goat rental

Leasing a goat for a giving period of time for the purpose of clearing an area of land.

The manager at the goat rental store suspected that Jason was lying about his rental goat running away when she saw the barbecue sauce stains all over his shirt.

by Mike Payne March 24, 2008

womb socket

Slang term for vagina.

Jason pulled over and offered to help a woman whose car broke down. After staring down her shirt the whole time she was checking the oil, he said "It looks like there's a problem with your womb socket. I ain't no mechanic, but I'd sure be happy to take a look."

by Mike Payne May 5, 2008

emo

emo kids have long hair that cover their eye and face. they wear thick eye liner because they think it makes them look dark and deep. They wear disgustingly tight clothing because emo is one step below transvestite. Emo kids listen to emo music, in which the singer bitches about his shitty life and lost love, and they play the same shitty guitar chord progressions in every single song. emo kids are total and complete flaming homosexuals like the famous butt fucker mike payne. Nobody ever moves or dances at an emo show, they just stand on their and observe. emo kids have no real problems in life but they love to pretend like they do. they sit in the dark all day and cut themselves and then cry themselves to sleep at night. Nobody likes emo kids becuase they are incredibly annoying and they are complete faggots who have no soul and dont deserve to live.

look at those tight jeans and gay hair... that kid is so emo.

by mike payne July 30, 2008

banana hammer

When a dude carries around a hammer in his pocket to give the impression that he has a perpetual erection.

When Jason pulled out his banana hammer, all Zee could say was "Wowwwww".

by Mike Payne March 5, 2008