michael gannett's definitions

Baltimoron

1 - n. the regional dialect of Baltimore, Maryland, in which syllables are often dropped and multiple words contracted into indistinct, mumbled phrases.
2 - n. persons speaking the regional dialect of Baltimore, Maryland. (affectionate term, used with respect)

1 - Baltimorons commonly call all members of the opposite sex "Hon," short for "honey."
2 - "Gone downy o-shun" is the phrase used to describe "Going down to the ocean (Ocean City)" for a vacation.
3 - "Wayoo ain calmee" is the urban Baltimore equivalent of "Why haven't you called me lately?"

by Michael Gannett February 16, 2006

Accountability

blame, in the sense that others are free from blame in assigning "accountability" to others

I want to assure the American People that this administration has assigned full accountability to uh, and that, uh, there are people who are, people in this administration, and that (whoever is scape goat du jour) accepts full accountability - and it's hard work! And we've, uh, he's got a job to do, and he's gonna do it. He's accountable!

by Michael Gannett February 16, 2006

fathermucker

Expletive describing religious fundamentalists and/or literalists who espouse the alleged teachings of prophets or deities of one of the paternalistic religious traditions such as Judaism, Christianity, or Islam, and who promote the adoption of such alleged teachings into laws regulating personal and social freedoms. Fathermuckers include parties as diverse as those who propose teaching Creationism as science and those who promote blowing oneself up in a crowd in order to please their deity/prophet.

So, let's just NOOK the FATHERMUCKERS!

by Michael Gannett February 14, 2006

drawing board

n. (figuratively) the design process, the stages of planning, or the beginning of a process

This idea really sucks - I think we need to go back to the drawing board.

by Michael Gannett February 22, 2006

suitcase

n. a potential lawsuit or case for litigation, in common use among the urban population of Baltimore

When a city bus containing 3 riders collided with another vehicle, the occupants lowered the windows and shouted to standers by, "C'mon and get in here - we got us a suitcase!"

I got my suitcase, and I'm coming to live at your house. (see own your house)

by Michael Gannett April 4, 2006

own your house

v. literally equating to "win a lawsuit against you."

A threatening phrase that condenses a situation to it's final proposed outcome that "I will sue you and win, thereby stripping you of your property." Variants would include living in (someone's) house.

See suitcase

1 - If you touch me again, I'm gonna own your house.
2 - You better watch what you say, or I'm going to own your house.
3 - If your malpractice insurance hadn't taken compensated the victim, she would own your house.

by Michael Gannett February 22, 2006

poofer

n. a fart, especially a short, sharp, small fart making little or no noise, generally a feminine kind of fart with little volumetric displacement or effect on the barometric pressure of the surroundings, the opposite of a sonic boom

Delicate Patty pretended to not even notice, let alone reveal, that a tiny, odorless poofer had escaped her exquisite bung hole like a subtle sigh.

by Michael Gannett February 15, 2006