body armor

Pads inserted into a woman's bra to make her breasts appear larger.

See also wonderbra, wondermeter.
When Pam arrived at work with breasts larger than they had been the day before, Dave knew she was wearing her body armor.
by Led Zeppole October 06, 2003
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jacktation

When a woman masturbates a man's penis with her breasts. (derived from the word "lactation," when a woman secretes milk from her breasts.)
Rick was tired of handjobs, so Barb got him off with jacktation instead.
by Led Zeppole October 01, 2003
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frickin critic

To be overly critical of another's speech or habits.
Jen said Rick was a frickin critic for constantly trying to correct the way she spoke.
by Led Zeppole October 04, 2003
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fucktard contest

An alternative, and very cynical, name for election day.
I'm going down to the polls on Tuesday to vote in the fucktard contest.
by Led Zeppole November 08, 2003
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park a tiger on the rug

A New Zealand expression for vomiting.
If you do another shot of tequila, you're going to park a tiger on the rug!
by Led Zeppole November 19, 2003
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smock job

A low-paying job in the retail industry that requires the wearing of a smock. The smock generally has a corporate logo or advertising slogan printed on it, turning the employee into a human billboard. The smock is often seen as demeaning by the employees who must wear them. Excellent examples of smock jobs are the salespeople at stores such as Wal-Mart, Sam's Club and Home Depot.
When Steve's job in the tech sector was eliminated and sent offshore, he had to swallow his pride and take a smock job at Wal-Mart just to pay the bills.
by Led Zeppole March 18, 2004
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Jersey massage

To physically assault someone, either with your fists or with a weapon, such as a baseball bat, pool cue, axe handle or pipe; in simple terms, a beatdown. The "Jersey" part of the phrase is a slang term for the State of New Jersey in the United States. Residents of New Jersey are known for being a bit more "physical" than most Americans when it comes to resolving disputes...
When I walked out of the bar and saw some scumbag pissing on the side of my car, I gave him a Jersey massage that he'll never forget.
by Led Zeppole March 12, 2004
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