Definitions by kris takahashi
executive branch
For men, all thoughts are legislated from the balls up, through the executive branch(aka penis) where it is signed into action, with only the brain left to sort out if that action was unconstitutional.
executive branch by kris takahashi April 22, 2010
slugging percentage
1. A measure of determining sexual scoring prowess calculated by dividing total bases(1B=kissing, 2B=touching, 3B=oral, 4B=Sex) by the number of dated partners.
2. In baseball, a statistic to gauge power by dividing total bases by at bats.
2. In baseball, a statistic to gauge power by dividing total bases by at bats.
After five dates and only one boob touch, John finished the 2010 dating season with a paltry .200 slugging percentage. However, he slugged a whopping .886 in for his company softball team.
slugging percentage by kris takahashi April 16, 2010
jock in an itch
the female equivalent of "panties in a bunch," i.e., when a woman issues a complaint typically made by males.
A: "Shopping again? But we just went yesterday."
B: "Alright, alright Sally, don't get your jock in an itch."
B: "Alright, alright Sally, don't get your jock in an itch."
jock in an itch by kris takahashi April 14, 2010
posthipsterism
If hipsterism is a rejection of classical fashion and preppy coolness, posthipsterism is an attempt to escape the dichotomy of geeks and jocks, shaggy hair and clean cut, cheerleader and vegan, guitar playing douchebag and captain of the football team.
Posthipsterism rejects the idea of a cultural truth, that things are inherently fashionable. The posthipster knows that everything is relative, that admitting you like a blockbuster movie can be every bit as brave and original as knowing the latest underground indie flick.
The posthipster believes creativity is not limited to a certain subgroup. The posthipster does not define himself by how he is different than the mainstream, but is guided by his individual tastes; he might have a playlist that features both top 10 music and obscure bands; he will not discriminate against fast food or chain stores, nor will he attach a romantic idea to thrift shops and mom and pop places. He might enjoy football on sunday afternoon and read a novel at night. Everything is judged by its own merit, and that judgment is entirely subjective.
Posthipsterism rejects the idea of a cultural truth, that things are inherently fashionable. The posthipster knows that everything is relative, that admitting you like a blockbuster movie can be every bit as brave and original as knowing the latest underground indie flick.
The posthipster believes creativity is not limited to a certain subgroup. The posthipster does not define himself by how he is different than the mainstream, but is guided by his individual tastes; he might have a playlist that features both top 10 music and obscure bands; he will not discriminate against fast food or chain stores, nor will he attach a romantic idea to thrift shops and mom and pop places. He might enjoy football on sunday afternoon and read a novel at night. Everything is judged by its own merit, and that judgment is entirely subjective.
Posthipsterism and Poshipsterist theory suggest that culturally there is no such thing as a guilty pleasure; pretending to not like something because you're worried it's too mainstream is just hipster bullshit.
posthipsterism by kris takahashi April 13, 2010
inflation
Thanks to inflation, it takes three joints to achieve the same high as smoking one joint ten years ago.
inflation by kris takahashi March 25, 2010
fundamentalist cop
fundamentalist cop by kris takahashi December 31, 2009
immaturation
by revisiting old posts we were able to witness the immaturation of the internet from a place of cordial dissent to whiny bickering.
immaturation by kris takahashi August 26, 2009