keifermail's definitions

Beer Vest

n. a drunks belief that no harm will befell them whilst engaged in risky behavior. Usually directly correlated to the amount of alcohol consumed. Not to be confused with Drunk Luck whereas most drunks are able to avoid injury when in accidents.

"Once he got his Beer Vest on, he jumped from the roof into the shallow end of the pool."

"Billy spent half the night putting on his Beer Vest, then he jumped off the dock and wrestled the gator."

by keifermail August 21, 2008

low riders

Refers to homosexual men wearing their pants low on the hip to expose colorful underwear in an attempt to attract a mate. The low riding pants signifies easy access to the mans rear compartment and not so subtly letting the other man know that he is on the down low. Originated in American prisons as a form of peacocking around the cell block. See alsoteardrop tattoo.

"Since I been wearing my FUBU's low riders style, I been getting hit on by dudes everywhere I go."

by keifermail August 8, 2009

Asskissitis

Contagious disease that is caused by employees seeing others getting promoted by kissing the bosses ass and they follow suit. Symptoms include brown nose and lips with blindness to the bosses ineptitude.

Have you seen how brown Sheila's lips are lately, looks like she has a bad case of asskissitis.

by keifermail June 29, 2009

Fart Game

The most recent addition to the Summer Olympic Games. The fart game is a game where opponents attempt to fart on each other. Made famous by Eddie Murphy's Delirious in 1983. Though the game has been played since Cain and Abel were adolescents.

"Ahhhh, dude you farted in my face. I had my mouth open and everything. It's on now! Let the fart game begin."

by keifermail September 12, 2009

Dookie Finger

A coup de grace where one drags their finger through their ass and wipes it under a rivals nose. Though, not used very often after adolescence, a dookie finger carries more weight than a slap in the face with a white glove.

Jacob wanted to give her a dirty sanchez before she dumped him but she wouldn't let him tap that ass, so he had to settle for a dookie finger.

by keifermail August 14, 2009

Sober

The unpleasant state between drinks.

I am sober unfortunately!

by keifermail September 6, 2009

two backed beast

N. Old literary term for sexual copulation. The most famous being a quote from William Shakespeare's Othello where Iago informs the King that his daughter has been having sex with a black man. Though modern high school students generally assume that making the two back beast is a reference to doing it doggy style the literal meaning in the 15th century was sex face to face or in the missionary position.

"If you tell Momma I was spying on you, then I'll tell her you and Jorge were making the two backed beast."

William Shakespeare. Othello. (1605): Iago: ' I am one, sir, that comes to tell you, your daughter and the Moor are now making-the-beast-with-two-backs .'

by keifermail August 22, 2008