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keifermail's definitions

Beer Vest

n. a drunks belief that no harm will befell them whilst engaged in risky behavior. Usually directly correlated to the amount of alcohol consumed. Not to be confused with Drunk Luck whereas most drunks are able to avoid injury when in accidents.
"Once he got his Beer Vest on, he jumped from the roof into the shallow end of the pool."

"Billy spent half the night putting on his Beer Vest, then he jumped off the dock and wrestled the gator."
by keifermail August 21, 2008
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beerterrogation

A process of extracting secret information from someone by getting them drunk and thereby loosening their ability to control their tongue.
We took the manager out and did some shots and pitchers. The beerterrogation worked, before long he admitted layoffs were coming.
by keifermail October 2, 2008
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Butt Duck

A beautiful term for an extremely Foul smelling fart. The term is made funnier if the fart sounds like quacking duck when expelled from the rectum. Though an SBD can still qualify as a Butt Duck if it is especially foul (emphasis on the word foul/fowl for comic effect). See frequently activated rectal tremble and shit flavored air.
"Fuck Mary, you shit a butt duck! I think you have cancer, something has crawled up your arse and died!"
by keifermail August 8, 2009
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Whack My Pug

N. Choke the chicken, manhandle the salami, whack off, spank the monkey, manually express semen, beat the meat, shake hands with your one-eyed best friend. To master your own domain.
"First thing I did when I got home was whack my pug. I swear I ain't never going to another cheer leading competition."
by keifermail July 12, 2009
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Assfuckitis

Chronic state of being an assfuck.
Sheila has a severe case of assfuckitis.
by keifermail August 8, 2009
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Lean Over

A light hangover. Very similar to a hangover except you are not hanging, just leaning.
Keifer: "Dude, I feel a little hungover, I only had three beers."
Neal: "You're having a lean over, man. You're only halfway there, you might as well have gotten completely smashed."
by keifermail July 12, 2009
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Finishing Position

N. Alternate name for doggy style. The name is derived from men's inability to last very long in this position. Hence, once he starts getting it doggie, he's finished.
"Ward's ass came home drunk and frisky. He was on top of me riding away- blowing his beer breath all over me, I couldn't take anymore so I rolled over into the finishing position and let nature take it's course."
by keifermail December 10, 2009
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