jvarna5's definitions

scientology salesman

The guy who repeatedly calls and emails you to come to Dianetics office to take a personality test. Really, it's just another way to convince you to buy more scientology crap.

Jon: "I honestly don't want to be a scientologist."

Greg: "Ha, HA, HA, ha...I knew you would say that.That's why I want you to purchase this workbook from Ron, it explains exactly how you are feeling right now."

Jon: "Tom Cruise is gay."

Greg: "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!"

Jon: "Ha, got rid of that scientology salesman."

by jvarna5 February 1, 2008

breaking my balls

Phrase that Italian Mafia members use frequently when someone is giving them a hard time.

Joey "the fag" Calzone: "Hey Jimmy, stop breaking my balls, will ya!!!

Jimmy "Dingleberry" Dinello: "Yo Jimmy, I'll be breakin ya face is yous don't shut da hell up! Look at this guy!"

by jvarna5 January 28, 2008

earl

The urban New Orleans way of saying oil

B-Loc: "Picture my car breaking down, my nigga!!!"

Lil Feces: "You probably need some earl up in yo shit, yea"

by jvarna5 January 30, 2008

Hobo Chili

Any combination of readily available ingredients stirred together in a pot or used soup-can over an open fire. Ingredients can include: Pigeons, fecal matter, babies, dogs, grass, fingers.

Best served with a vintage Merlot, but toilet wine will suffice.

Crazy Homeless man: "A dead hooker, three mice, and a used condom? Oh, it's Hobo Chili time!"

by jvarna5 January 30, 2008

big sis

A sorority girl who is the mentor of a new sorority (statistic) member. New members zealously love their "big sis", and they usually proclaim their love by window-chalking "I LUV MY BIG SIS!!!" all over their car.

New sorority girl: "I love my big sis!! I love her, I love her, I love her, I love her, I love her..."

New sorority girl's boyfriend: "Uhhh..."

by jvarna5 January 28, 2008

redneck riviera

The Mississippi and Alabama Gulf Coast that includes Biloxi, Gulf Shores, and Gulfport. The water tends to look like raw sewage and the air smells like sweaty tampons. The beaches are usually littered with broken beer bottles and old condoms. Fine dining along the beach consists of... a Waffle House.

Tyrone: "Where da hell you going in those confederate flag swimming trunks, T-Bob?!?"

T-Bob: "I reckon I'm going to Biloxi beach."

Tyrone: "That ain't no beach, you dumb cracka! That's just the redneck riviera!!!"

by jvarna5 January 28, 2008

Cappuccino

Overpriced espresso beverage that usually has some artificial flavoring to take away the coffee taste. Be wary of loads of foam that tops it, or someone may think you've been giving BJs.

Chris:" What's in the Starbucks cup? Cappuccino?"

Jon: "Actually, the cup is empty. I just carry the cup around because it matches my emo glasses"

by jvarna5 January 28, 2008