religion

usually based on selling people a personal insurance policy that can only be cashed in at death by the purchaser. therefore, impossible to know whether said religion has enough assets in the account to draw on or whether the seller has skipped off with the benefits, until too late. therefore, faith based. often accompanied by general claim to a sky-god/s authority of some kind, portrayed usually by representatives as a highly-strung, insecure person/s with a do-or-die outlook on life ie. 'you do or you die'. choice of insurers avaiable with various policy standards and disclaimers. onus upon buyer to prove worthiness rather than on sky-god. representatives arbitrate on disputes but no findings ever in favour of claimants thusfar.
religion...... the word 'ligion' said over and over again.
anyone know what a 'ligion' is?
by Hedley Clubnobber September 28, 2006
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barry

A town in South Wales. Scene of an awful genetic experiment in the late 20th C, that turned everyone into a chav. Barry leaves you feeling you've just spent an hour blowing up a balloon with a hole it.
The juvenile courts do a brisk trade.
Like most Welsh Towns the locals set the tone with a fair share of 'go-lightlies' on high-carb, high-fat, plenty-of-it diets. Oblivious as to how stupid they look, a pleasant Saturday can be spent watching local salad- dodgers grazing in the run-down shopping area. (However cannot rival Caerphilly as 'Fat Central'}
High Points:
Port Road; which largely avoids the place altogether.
Barry Island; which largely avoids culture altogether.
The local chemical works; main attraction.
The docks; which in the rain look like a lowry painting .
Er....that's it.
'Barry; A Great Place To Leave'
by Hedley Clubnobber August 01, 2006
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military intelligence

they went looking for weapons of mass destruction in 2001, that Colin Powell's military intelligence said were there. as a result there are 150k dead civillians, around 12k dead soldiers and 25k wounded, as a direct result of the wars forced on Iraq and Afghanistan. He need have looked no further than any American state.....like Utah or Israel.
by Hedley Clubnobber September 27, 2006
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newport

Newport, South Wales, another chav hot-spot badly in need of a WMD. Sandwich filling between Bristol and Cardiff like a bug between a road and a shoe. The Romans abondoned the area around 410ad and the British Labour Party eventually took over, hence it remains a ruin. The river Usk flows through it and the M4 goes past it. Never stop or you'll lose your hubcaps. Scene of Chaterist Rebellion and the founding of the Trade Union Movement, so not all bad news. Nice on the outskirts.
Newport Highlights;
Ringland, Alway, Somerton & Duffryn council estates designed by 1960's graduate town planners on speed, now scenic backdrops to Mordor; Pil for the final volcano scene.
Everything-for-a-Pound Shops.
Splendind Transporter Bridge (now that is a work of engineering art)
The Steel Works (now abandoned too)
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
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communist

A believer; specifically in a political-economic religion. Identical to fascist, fundamentalist, maoist, capitalist, banker. Believes most humans can contribute equally except those who contribute nothing, in which case they form the 'Blessed Leadership'.
Wishes to replace one form of expolitation with another to prove the point.
Believes in 'The State' but not in the 'individual'.
Doesn't believe in God but does believe in Gold (Spot the difference?> That's right!; there's 'L' in gold). Against natural law, believes opposites repel and, therefore, finds freedom confusing, worrisome & always dangerous.
Joyfully celebrates success by parading earth-cracking weapons from time-to-time and then explodes them, rendering large parts of the world uninhabitable.
Famous communist experiments in equality:
In the Soviet Union, everbody queued.
In China, everyone has the same haircut.
In Tibet, everyone is beaten regularly.
In Albania & Zimbabwe, everyone is dog-poor.
In the European Union they are preparing to queue, have the same haircut, be beaten regularly & become dog-poor.
by Hedley Clubnobber August 28, 2006
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comprehensive education

British socialist experiment (further enhanced by successive generations of hapless politicians) that forced fee paying schools out of business, raised the school leaving age and tried to give all children between 4 and 16 a basic education in several subjects. 'Basic' is about as good as it gets for most victims forced as they are into mind-numbing boredom, despair and violence. Most schools are like open, juvenile prisons. Still, American state schools make every one of 'em look like Oxford!
teenage pregnancy? routine bullying? can't read and write without the aid of 15 years further education? teacher's all suicidal? no future? no motivation? no prospects? It has to be comprehensive education!
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
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yeshua

person: hebrew original of Greek equivalent, jesus. loved by direct followers (sometimes but not always known as christians) and by muslims; hated within judaism for showing up the leadership at a bad time and still at it today. semite who regularly gave the jewish hierachy a verbal slapping much to the joy of the oppressed and downtrodden. crucified by the jews and romans out of jealousy and fear, came back from the dead just to piss 'em off. hope of the hopeless, scourge of the self-satisfied.
yeshua: double affirmative ; yes! hua!
by Hedley Clubnobber September 29, 2006
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